Brandt Tobler joins me on Only Bombs! for a conversation about comedy, storytelling, taking chances, being broke, meeting your heroes, and how all of that played a part in his journey.
Brandt grew up in Wyoming, where becoming a comedian seemed so unrealistic that he said he thought he had a "better chance of becoming an astronaut." We get into his move to Las Vegas, chickening out of stand-up for two years, bombing his way through the early days and eventually realizing that being more honest and vulnerable made people connect with him even more.
This one goes everywhere. Brandt names a ton of very famous comedians he worked with and how they affected his own growth. One of my favorite stories he tells is how Brad Garrett helped push him to also become an author.
Eventually Brandt says something that really sums up the entire conversation: “I outdreamed my dreams.”
That stuck with me during the interview itself, and I wanted to make a note of that for this actual release.
I had already read Free Roll before we sat down and genuinely loved the book. Getting to hear Brandt talk about how it actually came together, including the moment he held the finished book for the first time and started crying in the middle of a Chick-fil-A, made this episode even more special.
Brandt, thank you for coming over, being open, and talking comedy with me. I really enjoyed this one. I learned a lot, and I am looking forward to having you back, bud.
🎤FOLLOW BRANDT TOBLER
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📖 FREE ROLL:
💣 ONLY BOMBS! COMEDY PODCAST
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00:00:00 --> 00:00:02 I grew up in Wyoming. You couldn't even dream
00:00:02 --> 00:00:04 of being in a comic. You know, there was no comic.
00:00:04 --> 00:00:07 There was nothing. There was just, uh... You
00:00:07 --> 00:00:09 know, I wanted to be a JV basketball coach and
00:00:09 --> 00:00:11 a PE teacher was my dream. Sometimes I would
00:00:11 --> 00:00:14 just, like, if I was at some fancy person's house
00:00:14 --> 00:00:15 or something, I'd go in the bathroom and pee
00:00:15 --> 00:00:17 and then just, like, look in the mirror and be
00:00:17 --> 00:00:19 like, can you believe we're fucking... Can you
00:00:19 --> 00:00:22 believe we're here? And I had to smile then go
00:00:22 --> 00:00:24 out and be cool, but I never took it for granted.
00:00:24 --> 00:00:27 I was doing, so Brad Garrett, you know the guy
00:00:27 --> 00:00:29 from Everybody Loves Raymond, like the tall guy,
00:00:29 --> 00:00:31 and then he's like, you know what, just do this,
00:00:31 --> 00:00:33 just write 30 pages of your best stories and
00:00:33 --> 00:00:35 then bring them back to me. And he's like, I'm
00:00:35 --> 00:00:37 not saying I could do anything, I'm not, he's
00:00:37 --> 00:00:39 like, I'll try to help you, but it's Hollywood,
00:00:39 --> 00:00:41 I don't know, but what you have is something
00:00:41 --> 00:00:44 special and I'll help you if I can. So then I
00:00:44 --> 00:00:46 had those 30 pages to start with of stories and
00:00:46 --> 00:00:48 then I just started writing a book. just looking
00:00:48 --> 00:00:51 at this book like I fucking I did it then I was
00:00:51 --> 00:00:53 like what if nobody buys it and like who cares
00:00:53 --> 00:00:55 they can never take this away from me you know
00:00:55 --> 00:01:03 I did it welcome to holy bombs man thank you
00:01:03 --> 00:01:05 thank you for having me oh yeah great setup you
00:01:05 --> 00:01:07 have here this is dope thanks dude thanks yeah
00:01:07 --> 00:01:10 it's a culmination of many months of just getting
00:01:10 --> 00:01:12 random shit and seeing what works yeah I like
00:01:12 --> 00:01:14 it that's I was like going to different people's
00:01:14 --> 00:01:16 podcast studios everybody has Everybody has their
00:01:16 --> 00:01:18 own little crazy shit that probably fans have
00:01:18 --> 00:01:20 sent in or the weird stuff you've gotten over
00:01:20 --> 00:01:24 time. So, cool. Yeah, yeah. That's exactly what
00:01:24 --> 00:01:25 I did. I started collecting things that people
00:01:25 --> 00:01:28 just brought me and then, you know, I was like,
00:01:28 --> 00:01:30 man, this is really cool. And, you know, I don't
00:01:30 --> 00:01:33 know. I like it, man. I just like showing off
00:01:33 --> 00:01:35 everything. Did you have a video podcast? No,
00:01:36 --> 00:01:38 I had a podcast studio in my house. And then
00:01:38 --> 00:01:40 that's what I was just going to say is if you
00:01:40 --> 00:01:42 came to my house now in my podcast studio, which
00:01:42 --> 00:01:43 isn't really a podcast studio anymore because
00:01:43 --> 00:01:46 I haven't done a pod in a while. So now there's
00:01:46 --> 00:01:47 just a bunch of random stuff in there. So if
00:01:47 --> 00:01:49 you came in, you'd be like, what is all this
00:01:49 --> 00:01:52 weird stuff? It makes sense when it's in a podcast
00:01:52 --> 00:01:54 studio. But if you go into my podcast studio
00:01:54 --> 00:01:56 now, because all the mics and stuff are put away,
00:01:57 --> 00:01:59 it just looks like a crazy hoarder with a bunch
00:01:59 --> 00:02:01 of random stuff. But it's all cool stuff that
00:02:01 --> 00:02:04 people had sent me over. Podcast fans are the
00:02:04 --> 00:02:06 best, man. Once they love the pod, they will...
00:02:06 --> 00:02:10 I've gotten the coolest gifts and the most meaningful
00:02:10 --> 00:02:12 gifts from podcast fans because they listen and
00:02:12 --> 00:02:14 then they know. They're like sincere gifts instead
00:02:14 --> 00:02:17 of just. But they'd also like at one point I
00:02:17 --> 00:02:19 love Chipotle, they just hit me with a Chipotle
00:02:19 --> 00:02:21 gift card, which is always good too. Never going
00:02:21 --> 00:02:24 to complain about that. No, hell no, man. Do
00:02:24 --> 00:02:26 you have anything that you keep in there that
00:02:26 --> 00:02:28 you're just like, oh, this is really meaningful?
00:02:29 --> 00:02:34 Just like baseball cards. There's a story, Jeff
00:02:34 --> 00:02:37 Dye and I. It's a long story. Jeff, I did it
00:02:37 --> 00:02:39 on this not happening, but we stole this football
00:02:39 --> 00:02:42 player's jersey. This kicker for the Colts, Mike
00:02:42 --> 00:02:44 Vanderjack, we stole his jersey from his bar.
00:02:45 --> 00:02:47 And then, uh, and then one of, one of the fans,
00:02:47 --> 00:02:49 and then we had to give it back. It was a whole
00:02:49 --> 00:02:52 big thing. And then, um, one of the fans found
00:02:52 --> 00:02:56 like a Vanderjack card with the, with his like
00:02:56 --> 00:02:59 game or Jersey, uh, in it, like a baseball card.
00:02:59 --> 00:03:01 So he sent that to me, which made me laugh. Oh,
00:03:01 --> 00:03:04 that's good. Um, yeah. Like cool art, I've had
00:03:04 --> 00:03:06 people like draw, you know, make me look way
00:03:06 --> 00:03:08 cooler than I am. That's like a good artist can
00:03:08 --> 00:03:11 just do cool stuff. So in the, in the studio
00:03:11 --> 00:03:15 I have, yeah, like, uh, just, just a lot of cool
00:03:15 --> 00:03:17 art that people sent me. Man, that's epic. Yeah.
00:03:18 --> 00:03:19 And clothes. I'm from Wyoming. So people send
00:03:19 --> 00:03:21 me cool Wyoming stuff. Yeah. Cause no one really
00:03:21 --> 00:03:24 cares about Wyoming. Like, if you found something
00:03:24 --> 00:03:26 Wyoming out here, you would, most people just
00:03:26 --> 00:03:29 like, oh, that goes to brand or who cares? So
00:03:29 --> 00:03:31 people find Wyoming stuff and they always send
00:03:31 --> 00:03:33 it to me cause I'm pretty much the only Wyoming
00:03:33 --> 00:03:36 comic, you know? I think. Yeah. I mean, there's
00:03:36 --> 00:03:38 a couple of few trying to come up right now,
00:03:38 --> 00:03:40 but. I don't know, man. Yeah, I can't, I can't
00:03:40 --> 00:03:42 pin it. Yeah. I think you might be the only one.
00:03:42 --> 00:03:44 Yeah. That's why I'm sure every comic you've
00:03:44 --> 00:03:45 had on here, people are like, did you always
00:03:45 --> 00:03:48 want to be a comic? I was like, I didn't. I grew
00:03:48 --> 00:03:49 up in Wyoming. You couldn't even dream of being
00:03:49 --> 00:03:51 a comic. You know, there was no comic. There
00:03:51 --> 00:03:54 was nothing. There was just, uh, you know, I
00:03:54 --> 00:03:57 wanted to be a JV basketball coach and a PE teacher
00:03:57 --> 00:04:00 was my dream. And then, um, then later in life,
00:04:00 --> 00:04:03 of course I found comedy, but yeah. I'm not like
00:04:03 --> 00:04:06 most comics. It was, I didn't even, it was, I
00:04:06 --> 00:04:08 thought I'd be an astronaut before I could be
00:04:08 --> 00:04:11 a comedian. Oh, right, right. Yeah, I mean, how
00:04:11 --> 00:04:12 old were you when you actually did get started?
00:04:12 --> 00:04:15 So I started, I think, you know, it's wild as
00:04:15 --> 00:04:18 I have a video of it and I don't even want to
00:04:18 --> 00:04:20 watch it because I know how terrible I am. I
00:04:20 --> 00:04:23 get it. Well, you know, I take that back. I actually
00:04:23 --> 00:04:27 did good my first time for where I was at. I
00:04:27 --> 00:04:29 would cringe a little now just from doing it
00:04:29 --> 00:04:32 this long, but. Because I was supposed to start
00:04:32 --> 00:04:35 in Phoenix, but then I kept chickening out because
00:04:35 --> 00:04:37 a couple of times I talked into a microphone
00:04:37 --> 00:04:39 and when I heard my voice amplified, it made
00:04:39 --> 00:04:42 my eyes water. So I was like, I can't be a crying
00:04:42 --> 00:04:45 comedian. So I chickened out for like two years,
00:04:45 --> 00:04:48 but I was still writing. And then I got to Vegas
00:04:48 --> 00:04:51 and I signed up a couple of times and then I
00:04:51 --> 00:04:53 would cancel the day of. And then my friends
00:04:53 --> 00:04:54 eventually are like, yo, you keep talking about
00:04:54 --> 00:04:57 doing this. Are you going to do it or what? So
00:04:57 --> 00:04:58 then I had a couple of beers and like 10 of my
00:04:58 --> 00:05:00 friends came and then I actually did really good.
00:05:00 --> 00:05:02 I actually did really good the first three or
00:05:02 --> 00:05:05 four times because I didn't know you're allowed
00:05:05 --> 00:05:07 to repeat material either. So I had a brand new
00:05:07 --> 00:05:10 like five minutes set the first four times. Okay.
00:05:11 --> 00:05:13 And then after that I bombed like the next 96
00:05:13 --> 00:05:16 times probably because I got, and I got a little
00:05:16 --> 00:05:20 cocky. And so I, it's weird to say I did good,
00:05:20 --> 00:05:22 but just knowing what I know about comedy now.
00:05:22 --> 00:05:24 Well, first of all, I wore shorts. I think I
00:05:24 --> 00:05:26 had shorts and flip -flops on, which are, like,
00:05:26 --> 00:05:29 the two biggest rules. So I'm not even that mad
00:05:29 --> 00:05:32 about my material, but just, like, my stage presence
00:05:32 --> 00:05:35 and stuff like that. As, like, a pro comic now,
00:05:35 --> 00:05:37 I'd be like, oh, man, you did everything you're
00:05:37 --> 00:05:39 not supposed to do. But I didn't know. You didn't
00:05:39 --> 00:05:42 know, yeah. Vegas was a hard scene to come up
00:05:42 --> 00:05:45 in because just, like, just a terrible scene
00:05:45 --> 00:05:48 for comedy, really, still to this day. Like the
00:05:48 --> 00:05:50 local scene's just terrible because there's too
00:05:50 --> 00:05:52 much good shit you could be doing that's way
00:05:52 --> 00:05:54 better than stand -up, you know? I was like,
00:05:54 --> 00:05:56 I'll never be as good as like a Circus Away show
00:05:56 --> 00:05:59 or there's concerts or there's gambling, you
00:05:59 --> 00:06:03 know? So the Vegas scene is never really taken
00:06:03 --> 00:06:05 off because it's just, there's some good clubs
00:06:05 --> 00:06:07 there now and like LA Comedy Club is my home
00:06:07 --> 00:06:11 club and they were very supportive. But the shows
00:06:11 --> 00:06:13 we would do, it was just terrible. It would be
00:06:13 --> 00:06:16 a bar and then, for instance, I think I've performed
00:06:16 --> 00:06:19 at four bars that have been on Bar Rescue. That's
00:06:19 --> 00:06:21 how shitty these bars were. But they eventually,
00:06:22 --> 00:06:24 and in Vegas, a new bar would open and then they
00:06:24 --> 00:06:28 would start with, they would go live music and
00:06:28 --> 00:06:30 then they would go trivia, then they'd go bingo.
00:06:31 --> 00:06:33 then they'd work their way down to comedy, and
00:06:33 --> 00:06:35 then they'd go to rap music, and then someone
00:06:35 --> 00:06:36 would get killed or stabbed, and then the bar
00:06:36 --> 00:06:39 would close, and it would start all over. But
00:06:39 --> 00:06:41 that's just what the Vegas scene was. Luckily,
00:06:42 --> 00:06:46 my friends I started with are still, I still
00:06:46 --> 00:06:47 have some really good friends that I started
00:06:47 --> 00:06:52 with, but the scene is terrible, which you would
00:06:52 --> 00:06:54 think it'd be like a good scene. When I got to
00:06:54 --> 00:06:56 Vegas, I was like, oh, this would be a great
00:06:56 --> 00:06:58 scene. If I would have stayed in Phoenix, I probably
00:06:58 --> 00:07:01 would have been much, much better off. Because
00:07:01 --> 00:07:03 again, too, when I started the local clubs, they
00:07:03 --> 00:07:08 didn't care about local comics because comics
00:07:08 --> 00:07:10 back then just wanted to come to Vegas. So if
00:07:10 --> 00:07:12 you headlined, let's say Seattle or Sacramento,
00:07:12 --> 00:07:14 you would take a step down so you could be in
00:07:14 --> 00:07:19 Vegas. Because this is like 2005 maybe when Vegas
00:07:19 --> 00:07:22 was still cool. Like it was the coolest back
00:07:22 --> 00:07:25 then. Yeah. I know you were traveling a lot back
00:07:25 --> 00:07:30 then. Yeah. Also from reading your book, Free
00:07:30 --> 00:07:32 Roll, by the way, you all go read it. It's fucking
00:07:32 --> 00:07:34 amazing. Thank you. Thank you. I appreciate that.
00:07:35 --> 00:07:37 From reading your book, it said that you were
00:07:37 --> 00:07:40 a class clown in ninth grade. You got that and
00:07:40 --> 00:07:42 I was pretty awesome. Yeah. What was the hardest
00:07:42 --> 00:07:46 thing about going from just being funny to being
00:07:46 --> 00:07:48 funny on stand -up? Well, I always knew I was
00:07:48 --> 00:07:51 funny. Um, you know, cause I was class clown,
00:07:51 --> 00:07:53 junior high, class clown in high school. And,
00:07:53 --> 00:07:55 um, I always got to hang out with the older kids
00:07:55 --> 00:07:58 because I was funny and all the kids in my neighborhood.
00:07:58 --> 00:08:01 And, um, like the, those are the kids I wanted
00:08:01 --> 00:08:03 to be around. And then I was able to hang out
00:08:03 --> 00:08:05 with older kids cause I was funny, but again,
00:08:05 --> 00:08:09 it was never a dream. And I was going to college
00:08:09 --> 00:08:11 in Phoenix and then, uh, one of my childhood
00:08:11 --> 00:08:13 friends, Matt Farwell, one time I wasn't doing
00:08:13 --> 00:08:14 good at college. I was like, I don't know what
00:08:14 --> 00:08:17 I'm going to do. He's like, you should be a comedian.
00:08:17 --> 00:08:20 I was like, I don't even know how to do that.
00:08:20 --> 00:08:22 I don't know. You're funny. You could do it.
00:08:22 --> 00:08:24 And I was like, all right. And I went to Barnes
00:08:24 --> 00:08:26 and Noble. I bought a book and like a little
00:08:26 --> 00:08:28 tape recorder because that's what the book said
00:08:28 --> 00:08:31 to do. And then, uh, I read this book, but it
00:08:31 --> 00:08:33 still didn't. I didn't know, but I didn't know
00:08:33 --> 00:08:35 how to find an open mic. The book told you how
00:08:35 --> 00:08:37 to write and stuff, but I didn't know how to
00:08:37 --> 00:08:40 find open mics. And then, um, and then, uh, I
00:08:40 --> 00:08:43 just ended up my dad. got out of prison and we'll
00:08:43 --> 00:08:44 probably talk about that. But then my dad got
00:08:44 --> 00:08:46 out of prison and then I wanted to connect with
00:08:46 --> 00:08:49 my dad. So I just left Phoenix pretty abruptly
00:08:49 --> 00:08:51 and then moved to Vegas. And then luckily in
00:08:51 --> 00:08:54 Vegas, there was one open mic at this terrible,
00:08:54 --> 00:08:56 terrible bar called Boomers Humors. And then
00:08:56 --> 00:08:59 I found that and, uh, you know, that that'll
00:08:59 --> 00:09:01 probably always be my favorite. I've been fortunate
00:09:01 --> 00:09:04 to perform all over the world and theaters and
00:09:04 --> 00:09:07 stuff with that. Will always be my favorite place
00:09:07 --> 00:09:08 because that's where I started. That's my first
00:09:08 --> 00:09:10 like eight years. There's only, there's only
00:09:10 --> 00:09:13 one show in Vegas every week. And it was in this
00:09:13 --> 00:09:15 terrible like industrial place and you'd go over
00:09:15 --> 00:09:17 this little hill. And then you could see the
00:09:17 --> 00:09:19 parking lot when he came over the hill. And then
00:09:19 --> 00:09:20 those nights when there was like cars that I
00:09:20 --> 00:09:22 didn't know that weren't my friend's cars. When
00:09:22 --> 00:09:24 we knew there was like a newbie there with that
00:09:24 --> 00:09:26 brought people the way I get chills thinking
00:09:26 --> 00:09:28 about it right now. Cause that was like, cause
00:09:28 --> 00:09:30 it was only Sunday nights at like nine 30. It
00:09:30 --> 00:09:33 wasn't built to do good at comedy, but some of
00:09:33 --> 00:09:36 those nights you'd come over this hill and some
00:09:36 --> 00:09:38 nights you'd see like 30 cars and you're like,
00:09:39 --> 00:09:42 oh, we got a show tonight. So those are the feelings
00:09:42 --> 00:09:45 that that's what got me hooked. And then, you
00:09:45 --> 00:09:46 know, people always ask me, I've never done a
00:09:46 --> 00:09:48 drug or anything, but because I think I come
00:09:48 --> 00:09:50 from like drug addicts and come from just trash.
00:09:51 --> 00:09:52 So I would be addicted, but I did get addicted
00:09:52 --> 00:09:55 to this after that first time I did it. I was
00:09:55 --> 00:09:58 like, this is what I'm doing forever. Yeah, what
00:09:58 --> 00:10:00 was it? Was it, like, just the feedback of laughter?
00:10:00 --> 00:10:03 Yeah, just the rush of just, like, I don't know,
00:10:03 --> 00:10:06 just, like, I just felt... Well, there's probably,
00:10:06 --> 00:10:08 like, something getting off my back because I
00:10:08 --> 00:10:10 knew I wanted to do it and keep chickening out.
00:10:10 --> 00:10:12 Like I said, I chickened out for, like, two years.
00:10:13 --> 00:10:15 Yeah. Which is terrible. You know, when I tell
00:10:15 --> 00:10:16 comics, when people are like, I want to do it,
00:10:16 --> 00:10:19 I was like, do it tomorrow. Just start. Because
00:10:19 --> 00:10:21 it's all reps anyway. If you're thinking about
00:10:21 --> 00:10:23 a comedian, the best advice I can give you is
00:10:23 --> 00:10:26 just go. You gotta go. Like, I wasted two years.
00:10:26 --> 00:10:29 That's a lot of valuable time, you know? Yeah.
00:10:29 --> 00:10:32 So, um, I think it was just the relief of, like,
00:10:32 --> 00:10:34 because I knew I was funny, but, you know, it's
00:10:34 --> 00:10:36 a different beast to go on stage, or at least
00:10:36 --> 00:10:39 I thought it was then, so. And then just my friends
00:10:39 --> 00:10:42 being proud of me and, like, you know, that feeling
00:10:42 --> 00:10:45 of, like, I did it. I had a goal. I did it. And
00:10:45 --> 00:10:46 then it went good. And then all my friends are
00:10:46 --> 00:10:48 like, man, you were funny. Because, you know,
00:10:48 --> 00:10:51 everyone's like, if I take, like, a girl to a
00:10:51 --> 00:10:54 show now, they'll always be like, you know, I
00:10:54 --> 00:10:55 was worried you were not going to be funny. I'm
00:10:55 --> 00:10:57 like, I'm trying to fuck you. I wouldn't show
00:10:57 --> 00:11:00 you anything I'm bad at. So I didn't take you
00:11:00 --> 00:11:03 dancing or golfing. It always makes me laugh.
00:11:03 --> 00:11:05 They're like, I was just worried you wouldn't
00:11:05 --> 00:11:08 be funny. I'm like, I'm trying to impress you.
00:11:09 --> 00:11:12 I know I'm going to do good. That's why. Sometimes
00:11:12 --> 00:11:15 I get shit from the other comics. They're like,
00:11:15 --> 00:11:16 oh, you're just going to do the hits tonight
00:11:16 --> 00:11:18 because you brought a girl. I was like, well,
00:11:18 --> 00:11:20 yeah. Don't I'm not I don't need she can see
00:11:20 --> 00:11:22 the new stuff when we're dating but tonight I'm
00:11:22 --> 00:11:24 gonna try to do my best because this you saw
00:11:24 --> 00:11:26 her she's fine. They're like, you know, I get
00:11:26 --> 00:11:29 it Yeah, I gotta go. You gotta go dude. Yeah
00:11:29 --> 00:11:32 Did uh, what did you even get into it like with
00:11:32 --> 00:11:33 any kind of joke structure at all? Or did you
00:11:33 --> 00:11:37 just tell ya know, I wrote jokes. Um, I loved
00:11:37 --> 00:11:39 Hedberg Mitch Hedberg was the first one my first
00:11:39 --> 00:11:43 favorite comic and so I saw him the first show
00:11:43 --> 00:11:45 I ever saw was actually Jeff Fox were the Uh,
00:11:46 --> 00:11:49 he Jeff, I'm not just fast. Sorry. Uh, Bill Ingvall
00:11:49 --> 00:11:51 opened for faith Hill and Tim McGraw in Greeley,
00:11:51 --> 00:11:54 Colorado at this outdoor country music festival.
00:11:54 --> 00:11:56 So I saw that and that's what he was doing. Here's
00:11:56 --> 00:11:59 your sign. And I was like, this is pretty funny.
00:12:00 --> 00:12:01 I didn't know anything. I thought building ball
00:12:01 --> 00:12:04 was good, but then like a month later, I saw
00:12:04 --> 00:12:07 Hedberg on Letterman. And I was like, I tell
00:12:07 --> 00:12:09 the joke, I was like, that's that was like my
00:12:09 --> 00:12:11 sign. Here's the here's your actual sign. You
00:12:11 --> 00:12:14 should be a comedian. So, yeah, then I saw him.
00:12:14 --> 00:12:17 And then so by joke structure, I wrote joke joke
00:12:17 --> 00:12:19 jokes, just one liner short jokes because I loved
00:12:19 --> 00:12:24 Hedberg. And then somehow I got connected to
00:12:24 --> 00:12:26 Kyle Canane. Well, Kyle Canane was coming up
00:12:26 --> 00:12:30 and he was just like booking, you know, DIY shows.
00:12:30 --> 00:12:32 And then we reached out to him and then he came.
00:12:33 --> 00:12:35 and I watched Kanane perform for like 30 people
00:12:35 --> 00:12:37 in this back room and he was like telling stories
00:12:37 --> 00:12:40 and I was like, holy shit, this is, you know,
00:12:41 --> 00:12:45 so seeing Kanane made me believe I could write
00:12:45 --> 00:12:47 stories and then I had all these incredible stories.
00:12:47 --> 00:12:50 I was like. And then that's where I kind of separated
00:12:50 --> 00:12:51 because everybody at the time was writing jokes
00:12:51 --> 00:12:54 like Hedberg and Attell and then I have a crazy,
00:12:54 --> 00:12:56 like I said, I'm from Wyoming. First of all,
00:12:56 --> 00:12:59 no one in the world is doing that already. So
00:12:59 --> 00:13:02 watching Kanane made me kind of change the way
00:13:02 --> 00:13:05 I wrote and start to really tap into longer form
00:13:05 --> 00:13:09 stories, which definitely helped because, you
00:13:09 --> 00:13:12 know, people could connect my stories with me
00:13:12 --> 00:13:14 and eventually, you know. Became the guy that
00:13:14 --> 00:13:16 tried to kill his dad. So people would just Google.
00:13:17 --> 00:13:18 Hey, who's the comedian that tried to kill his
00:13:18 --> 00:13:21 dad again? There's not many of us out there So
00:13:21 --> 00:13:22 yeah, if I change you put in who's the Wyoming
00:13:22 --> 00:13:25 comedian try to kill his dad. That's much easier
00:13:25 --> 00:13:27 than it's just you Who's the comedian with the
00:13:27 --> 00:13:30 funny dating app joke? So yeah watching Canadian
00:13:30 --> 00:13:32 and I don't remember what he did I just remember
00:13:32 --> 00:13:35 leaving that day inspired and I was like and
00:13:35 --> 00:13:37 I booked him and then I didn't have a lot of
00:13:37 --> 00:13:40 money and I was I was waiting to pay him and
00:13:40 --> 00:13:41 I was worried he's going to be mad at me because
00:13:41 --> 00:13:43 I couldn't pay him. He eventually sent me a message
00:13:43 --> 00:13:45 like a week later, like, where's my money? But
00:13:45 --> 00:13:46 I was waiting for it to come from this brown
00:13:46 --> 00:13:49 paper tickets and I was like, shit, Gainane just
00:13:49 --> 00:13:52 like is the coolest. And now he's going to hate
00:13:52 --> 00:13:54 me because I didn't pay him his money in time.
00:13:54 --> 00:13:57 But luckily I got his money to him. Oh, yeah.
00:13:57 --> 00:13:58 It was like a worry because you know how it is.
00:13:59 --> 00:14:01 You're starting out. I was just like, that's
00:14:01 --> 00:14:02 when I first started producing shows. So I didn't
00:14:02 --> 00:14:05 know like. I just, I always thought that we'd
00:14:05 --> 00:14:07 sell more and just, you know, you just learn
00:14:07 --> 00:14:09 a lot. But yeah, so that's when it changed. I
00:14:09 --> 00:14:12 start writing stories. Then I realized stories
00:14:12 --> 00:14:14 are like short jokes. They're just reps. You
00:14:14 --> 00:14:16 just got to work on them. And then, and I just
00:14:16 --> 00:14:18 got more enjoyment out of telling my stories.
00:14:18 --> 00:14:20 Cause you know, everyone's like, what if someone
00:14:20 --> 00:14:22 steals your jokes? Which really rarely happens.
00:14:22 --> 00:14:25 People write similar jokes, but then I was like,
00:14:25 --> 00:14:27 I got these stories. Nobody has stories like
00:14:27 --> 00:14:29 this. I don't have to worry about joke thieves,
00:14:30 --> 00:14:31 which. I still don't think you really have to
00:14:31 --> 00:14:33 worry about. But when you're a young comic, you're
00:14:33 --> 00:14:35 always like, I can't put my joke on the internet.
00:14:35 --> 00:14:37 Someone's going to steal it and do it on The
00:14:37 --> 00:14:39 Tonight Show. I was like, first of all, your
00:14:39 --> 00:14:41 joke's terrible. That joke's never getting on
00:14:41 --> 00:14:44 The Tonight Show. But I was the same way. We
00:14:44 --> 00:14:46 were all just like, you protect your material.
00:14:46 --> 00:14:49 You think your material's so good that you want
00:14:49 --> 00:14:51 to protect it because you think it's going to
00:14:51 --> 00:14:53 change your life. And then over time, you realize,
00:14:53 --> 00:14:56 oh, that joke's fucking terrible. That joke is
00:14:56 --> 00:14:59 not. for network television. I think I'm in the
00:14:59 --> 00:15:00 terrible joke phase, but I'm still working it
00:15:00 --> 00:15:04 out. Were you ever, in the beginning, were you
00:15:04 --> 00:15:08 always open and vulnerable? Yeah, I tried to
00:15:08 --> 00:15:14 be. I think I've always just been, I've tried
00:15:14 --> 00:15:18 to be that my whole life. It's just easier. I
00:15:18 --> 00:15:20 feel like you make better connection, especially
00:15:20 --> 00:15:23 in the podcast world. I learned in comedy, the
00:15:23 --> 00:15:27 more vulnerable I was, then the better. the better
00:15:27 --> 00:15:29 everything went because then I could connect
00:15:29 --> 00:15:31 with people. Like again, they could connect with
00:15:31 --> 00:15:33 my stories. My stories connected better than
00:15:33 --> 00:15:37 just like a random joke. So all the podcast fans
00:15:37 --> 00:15:41 I ever got was from, like the Crab Feast, Ryan
00:15:41 --> 00:15:43 Sickler and Jay Larson used to have this podcast
00:15:43 --> 00:15:44 and they had just had amazing fans. And then
00:15:44 --> 00:15:47 I got on there and told my stories. And then
00:15:47 --> 00:15:50 I realized that from the more podcasts I did,
00:15:50 --> 00:15:52 the more real you are, the more people are like,
00:15:53 --> 00:15:56 this is my guy now. You know, they don't want,
00:15:57 --> 00:15:59 you know, there's some comics. I don't want to
00:15:59 --> 00:16:01 shit on comics, but there's some com there's
00:16:01 --> 00:16:02 comics. There's famous comics. I really like,
00:16:02 --> 00:16:04 but they never, you don't really know anything
00:16:04 --> 00:16:07 about them. They're just comedy, you know, queef
00:16:07 --> 00:16:09 gay. It was like, well, yeah, what about your
00:16:09 --> 00:16:13 life? I'd be much more. And I like to learn about
00:16:13 --> 00:16:16 stuff or learn about people. So I learned early
00:16:16 --> 00:16:19 that the more vulnerable I was, the more successful
00:16:19 --> 00:16:21 I was and the more I enjoyed doing it. You know,
00:16:21 --> 00:16:23 I like to just talk. I want to talk to you about.
00:16:24 --> 00:16:26 I just don't, you know, I lived in LA for 10
00:16:26 --> 00:16:29 years and I saw people that were performing when
00:16:29 --> 00:16:31 I thought we were having friendship conversations.
00:16:31 --> 00:16:34 I was like, oh, this is gross. You know? Yeah.
00:16:34 --> 00:16:38 So yeah. So luckily I've been, um, I've always
00:16:38 --> 00:16:40 been pretty confident in who I am and just, I'm
00:16:40 --> 00:16:42 just like, well, I'll just be myself because
00:16:42 --> 00:16:45 it's hard. I mean, I would tell a story. It's
00:16:45 --> 00:16:46 a terrible story. I shouldn't tell it on here,
00:16:46 --> 00:16:49 but like when I lived in Vegas and then one time
00:16:49 --> 00:16:51 I got a hooker and then I fell in love with this
00:16:51 --> 00:16:54 girl. And then. She asked on like the second
00:16:54 --> 00:16:55 day, have you ever had a hooker? And I was like,
00:16:55 --> 00:16:58 no. But then I had to ride that lie my whole
00:16:58 --> 00:17:00 life, you know, and then my friends had to lie.
00:17:00 --> 00:17:02 I have friends that, you know, are pieces of
00:17:02 --> 00:17:05 shit. And then they, and then I'm expected to
00:17:05 --> 00:17:06 lie for them the rest of their life. So I was
00:17:06 --> 00:17:09 like, I don't occasionally, I'm a degenerate,
00:17:09 --> 00:17:11 you know, I had this crazy Vegas life. I did,
00:17:12 --> 00:17:13 I wouldn't know if they're mistakes, but I did
00:17:13 --> 00:17:15 some people that I did some stuff that's pretty
00:17:15 --> 00:17:18 wild. And then I don't, I just would rather just
00:17:18 --> 00:17:21 be real instead of having to. kick my buddy under
00:17:21 --> 00:17:23 the table like, hey, don't tell that story. Hey,
00:17:23 --> 00:17:27 shut up, don't do this. That's definitely a lesson
00:17:27 --> 00:17:29 that I've been learning in my own stand -up is
00:17:29 --> 00:17:34 because I started very surface level. Now I'm
00:17:34 --> 00:17:38 starting to dig in deeper, but it's also difficult.
00:17:38 --> 00:17:41 Yeah, it's harder because you're being real and
00:17:41 --> 00:17:44 it's vulnerable. And you, I mean, it took me
00:17:44 --> 00:17:45 a while. Like I said, it didn't, I mean, I'm
00:17:45 --> 00:17:48 talking, I was probably writing joke jokes for
00:17:48 --> 00:17:50 six, seven years before that Canadian thing.
00:17:50 --> 00:17:53 And then even that still, you know, it took me
00:17:53 --> 00:17:57 maybe another two and a half years to get a real
00:17:57 --> 00:17:59 story. Cause the stories were hard. You know,
00:17:59 --> 00:18:02 you, you got a six minute story at about 90 seconds
00:18:02 --> 00:18:04 in the beginning, you're not doing good and you
00:18:04 --> 00:18:07 want to bail on that story. Cause you're like,
00:18:07 --> 00:18:08 what do I'm drowning here? But you just kind
00:18:08 --> 00:18:12 of have to drown sometimes. And then you'll eventually
00:18:12 --> 00:18:15 kick your way to the top or because it just reps
00:18:15 --> 00:18:18 like jokes, but it's such more, it's more rewarding.
00:18:18 --> 00:18:21 You know, I think to me, I love the stories I
00:18:21 --> 00:18:24 tell are like, it's just better than a joke joke
00:18:24 --> 00:18:27 to me. Yeah. Yeah. And I think to the audience
00:18:27 --> 00:18:31 too. Yeah, I think it's... But I was saying that
00:18:31 --> 00:18:32 David Tell's my favorite comedian, so... Oh,
00:18:33 --> 00:18:35 David Tell's amazing. Yeah, I mean, I would go.
00:18:36 --> 00:18:38 It's hard for me to watch comedy as a comedian,
00:18:38 --> 00:18:41 but if he comes, I'll sit and watch him every
00:18:41 --> 00:18:43 time. So, you know, there's always exception.
00:18:43 --> 00:18:46 It's everyone's on their own path. As generic
00:18:46 --> 00:18:48 as advice that is, it's everybody's on their
00:18:48 --> 00:18:51 own path. And for me, my path started out like
00:18:51 --> 00:18:54 a tell, and then now is more in long form stories.
00:18:54 --> 00:18:57 I try to. Yeah. And it takes up more time, which
00:18:57 --> 00:19:00 is great. One -liners, you got to write a lot
00:19:00 --> 00:19:03 of, you know, when I headline, you know, that's
00:19:03 --> 00:19:07 an hour. Yeah, a lot of one -liners. My stories
00:19:07 --> 00:19:09 are usually six, seven minutes, so that makes
00:19:09 --> 00:19:11 it a little easier. Dude, I know what you mean,
00:19:11 --> 00:19:14 man. Like, because when I'm noticing the difference,
00:19:14 --> 00:19:16 because I kind of started off writing the sort
00:19:16 --> 00:19:19 of, like, almost like street jokes. And then,
00:19:19 --> 00:19:21 you know, then I started doing, yeah, sorry about
00:19:21 --> 00:19:23 the dogs. Anyway. Oh yeah, I don't care. But
00:19:23 --> 00:19:24 then I started doing, like, you know, just...
00:19:24 --> 00:19:27 Kind of like story jokes. And now I'm like, okay,
00:19:27 --> 00:19:30 let me try to open up a little bit more. Who's
00:19:30 --> 00:19:32 your favorite when he started? So I've always
00:19:32 --> 00:19:36 been in like physical comedy. So like Dane Cook,
00:19:36 --> 00:19:40 you know, things like that. Like, yeah, and I
00:19:40 --> 00:19:42 loved him, but he's also a good writer. You know,
00:19:42 --> 00:19:44 he has good jokes, you know, and that was that
00:19:44 --> 00:19:47 was something that I needed to like to kind of
00:19:47 --> 00:19:49 kind of learn. And then I eventually went into
00:19:49 --> 00:19:53 like, like Jessel neck and David Tell and just
00:19:53 --> 00:19:56 You know, Norm MacDonald is huge. And I think
00:19:56 --> 00:19:58 Norm MacDonald for me was so big because I was
00:19:58 --> 00:20:04 like, he's so absurd yet intelligent. And the
00:20:04 --> 00:20:07 joke writing is so sharp. But it's like, it's
00:20:07 --> 00:20:10 like sharp for dull people. And so that works
00:20:10 --> 00:20:11 for me because it just hits me in there. Like
00:20:11 --> 00:20:13 the moth joke, for example, like just hits me
00:20:13 --> 00:20:16 just so good. I was hoping to work with him and
00:20:16 --> 00:20:19 I just always want to work with him. I've been
00:20:19 --> 00:20:21 fortunate to open or work with, you know, pretty
00:20:21 --> 00:20:25 much all my favorites and then My home club is
00:20:25 --> 00:20:27 comedy works in Denver and we I mean I think
00:20:27 --> 00:20:29 it's one the best club in the world and we book
00:20:29 --> 00:20:31 some of the best comics but occasionally she'll
00:20:31 --> 00:20:34 book somebody that like, you know, I'll just
00:20:34 --> 00:20:36 say it like something like Sometimes she'll book
00:20:36 --> 00:20:38 like someone like Mencia and there's a lot of
00:20:38 --> 00:20:40 comics and scenes like I'm not working with Mencia
00:20:40 --> 00:20:42 And then I call Wendy I go hey, whatever you
00:20:42 --> 00:20:44 need I'll host I'll feature I'll whatever And
00:20:44 --> 00:20:47 I'll take whatever shit gigs there are. So then
00:20:47 --> 00:20:49 once a year, when a tell comes or a norm or someone,
00:20:50 --> 00:20:52 I can say, Hey, Wendy, can I get that one? And
00:20:52 --> 00:20:55 she's, Wendy's always really good to me. So I
00:20:55 --> 00:20:56 learned that from the very beginning. Like I'll
00:20:56 --> 00:20:59 take these shit gigs. And then norm came twice
00:20:59 --> 00:21:01 when I was living in Denver, but he was bringing
00:21:01 --> 00:21:03 his own people. But, but I did get open for a
00:21:03 --> 00:21:06 tell one time and he brought me out on stage
00:21:06 --> 00:21:09 at the end. And I brought out my book and then
00:21:09 --> 00:21:13 he signed my book on stage and then he bought
00:21:13 --> 00:21:16 it from me for $20, made me take his $20, then
00:21:16 --> 00:21:18 gave it to someone in the crowd and then just
00:21:18 --> 00:21:20 roasted me for like 10 minutes, which was awesome.
00:21:20 --> 00:21:22 And it's awesome. And then I went out in the
00:21:22 --> 00:21:24 lobby and I sold all my books just cause Attelle
00:21:24 --> 00:21:26 was so nice. Like he didn't have to do that,
00:21:26 --> 00:21:28 but yeah, he brought me out. I tried to give
00:21:28 --> 00:21:29 him the $20 back in the green room. He's like,
00:21:29 --> 00:21:32 no, no, no. He's just so nice about the book.
00:21:32 --> 00:21:34 And then like I said, it helped me sell. Then
00:21:34 --> 00:21:37 because he like co -signed it on stage and then
00:21:37 --> 00:21:39 made fun of me and just getting roasted by Attelle
00:21:39 --> 00:21:42 was like an honor. Yeah. And then to go make
00:21:42 --> 00:21:44 a whole bunch of money. I never thought having
00:21:44 --> 00:21:47 like my favorite comic make fun of me would also
00:21:47 --> 00:21:49 make me a bunch of money. And I was like, those
00:21:49 --> 00:21:52 are like the best. I'm just lucky to be able
00:21:52 --> 00:21:53 to perform at ComedyWorks because it's just such
00:21:53 --> 00:21:56 a, she just, she just does everything right.
00:21:56 --> 00:21:59 Man, that is just an insane story. Yeah, so cool.
00:21:59 --> 00:22:01 Just all around, man. But that's what I'm saying.
00:22:01 --> 00:22:03 That's what I learned early too. Like I would
00:22:03 --> 00:22:06 sacrifice. I let, you know, everyone wants to
00:22:06 --> 00:22:09 ask for favors, but you know, Wendy knows if
00:22:09 --> 00:22:11 she needs anything. I've lived by the club last
00:22:11 --> 00:22:14 second. I'm there. She needs anything. I'm there.
00:22:14 --> 00:22:17 And then, and then if you pick your spots and
00:22:17 --> 00:22:19 when you do get a chance to ask for something,
00:22:19 --> 00:22:20 I think it's pretty easy for her to be like,
00:22:20 --> 00:22:23 yeah, of course. I can always count on you if
00:22:23 --> 00:22:25 I can, you know, or that's how you hope it is.
00:22:25 --> 00:22:27 And lucky enough for me, it's like that. So.
00:22:28 --> 00:22:31 Yeah, but I got a I had a cool one with Gillis
00:22:31 --> 00:22:33 the first time Gillis came to ComedyWorks He
00:22:33 --> 00:22:36 had never done ComedyWorks and it was his birthday
00:22:36 --> 00:22:38 and everybody kind of gave me shit for this But
00:22:38 --> 00:22:42 I I got a host and I think McCusker was the middle
00:22:42 --> 00:22:45 pretty sure was McCusker and then I know it was
00:22:45 --> 00:22:49 McKeeves and then I introduced him I was like
00:22:49 --> 00:22:51 this is To your headliner, this is, it's his
00:22:51 --> 00:22:54 birthday. And I said, this is his first time
00:22:54 --> 00:22:56 here and this will be his last time here. He's,
00:22:56 --> 00:22:58 he's not going to be here again. And you know,
00:22:58 --> 00:23:00 Shane Gillis and they went crazy and everyone's
00:23:00 --> 00:23:02 like, why'd you say that? I go, cause I know
00:23:02 --> 00:23:05 he's about to be a fucking giant star. I didn't
00:23:05 --> 00:23:07 know he'd sell out football stadiums, but, and
00:23:07 --> 00:23:09 Shane's so humble. They were like, I don't know
00:23:09 --> 00:23:11 if he liked that intro. I was like, ah, my bad,
00:23:11 --> 00:23:14 but. It was a true intro. I was like, I could
00:23:14 --> 00:23:15 tell when the rocket ship's about to take off.
00:23:15 --> 00:23:17 I've been doing it long enough. And I was like,
00:23:17 --> 00:23:20 give this man, you better cheer for him now because
00:23:20 --> 00:23:22 next time you see him, it's going to be in a
00:23:22 --> 00:23:24 big ass theater with tickets three times as much
00:23:24 --> 00:23:27 as this. Yeah, it was a I've seen him a few times
00:23:27 --> 00:23:31 here and I almost ID him once. Oh, yeah. Yeah
00:23:31 --> 00:23:33 Like, you know cuz I saw him walking up and I
00:23:33 --> 00:23:35 just didn't recognize them. Hey, what's your
00:23:35 --> 00:23:38 oh never mind? Yeah, I recognize you dude. Yeah,
00:23:38 --> 00:23:40 I've been around him a couple times I wouldn't
00:23:40 --> 00:23:42 say we're like friends, but he's always been
00:23:42 --> 00:23:45 cool. But I know I I when people ask me like
00:23:45 --> 00:23:47 Who do you hate or something? They'll always
00:23:47 --> 00:23:49 ask about certain people and I'm like dude the
00:23:49 --> 00:23:52 he I can I don't know anybody can say a bad thing
00:23:52 --> 00:23:54 about Shane and I don't I can't he's been super
00:23:54 --> 00:23:57 I mean He's been good to everybody. I love how
00:23:57 --> 00:23:59 he just took care of all his guys. I think he's
00:23:59 --> 00:24:02 doing it right. The bigger the comic, the cooler.
00:24:05 --> 00:24:07 I've hung around the biggest comics in the world
00:24:07 --> 00:24:10 and they're always the coolest. First time I
00:24:10 --> 00:24:13 met Chappelle, He would just talk to me like
00:24:13 --> 00:24:14 a comedian. He's like, where were you last week?
00:24:15 --> 00:24:16 I was in Jacksonville. He's like, are they still
00:24:16 --> 00:24:19 doing it at that hotel? Is Amy still the manager?
00:24:19 --> 00:24:22 I'm just sitting there trying not to drool on
00:24:22 --> 00:24:24 his brand new Jordan. This is fucking crazy.
00:24:25 --> 00:24:27 That's what I love about being around comics
00:24:27 --> 00:24:29 and all these comics have always said this. You've
00:24:29 --> 00:24:33 already heard this, but yeah, the bigger the
00:24:33 --> 00:24:35 comic, once I get around them, they're just like.
00:24:36 --> 00:24:38 Whatever level I'm at then they've already been
00:24:38 --> 00:24:39 there and they just want to talk about that or
00:24:39 --> 00:24:42 it's like I just think it's so cool You know,
00:24:42 --> 00:24:43 they say you never want to meet your heroes,
00:24:43 --> 00:24:46 but I think comedy is like the only The only
00:24:46 --> 00:24:48 place where it's not like that. Yeah. Yeah everyone
00:24:48 --> 00:24:50 I could say sucks You won't even know cuz they're
00:24:50 --> 00:24:53 just bitter old dudes. It didn't that are mad
00:24:53 --> 00:24:55 at TikTok and shit right now. Yeah, it seems
00:24:55 --> 00:24:58 like what they look at is the people who are
00:24:58 --> 00:25:00 just in it for the clout. Yeah. You know what
00:25:00 --> 00:25:02 I mean? And just getting booked for, I guess,
00:25:02 --> 00:25:04 the clout. I think that's a popular thing that
00:25:04 --> 00:25:07 I'm seeing online lately. Or the money. When
00:25:07 --> 00:25:08 people ask me about money, I was like, we don't
00:25:08 --> 00:25:11 do any of this for money. Right. It's not for
00:25:11 --> 00:25:13 money. Yeah. I go, you're just broke forever.
00:25:13 --> 00:25:15 And then some of us grind it out. And we're in
00:25:15 --> 00:25:17 the middle. And then some of my friends are richest
00:25:17 --> 00:25:20 dudes. And they have private jets. And they live.
00:25:21 --> 00:25:23 a different life, but there's no, but none of
00:25:23 --> 00:25:27 us are ever like money. I mean, after time, I
00:25:27 --> 00:25:29 don't even look at my check just because I've
00:25:29 --> 00:25:32 been fucked so many times. It's never more than
00:25:32 --> 00:25:34 what it's supposed to be. You know what I mean?
00:25:34 --> 00:25:37 Whenever I do a gig somewhere or something, I'm
00:25:37 --> 00:25:39 like, I've never just opened a check. and then
00:25:39 --> 00:25:41 have it be like, holy shit, they gave me a bonus
00:25:41 --> 00:25:43 or they did something nice. Very rarely, a couple
00:25:43 --> 00:25:45 places. But most of the time, it's less than
00:25:45 --> 00:25:47 what I thought I was getting and then it ruins
00:25:47 --> 00:25:49 the whole night. So I'm a terrible businessman
00:25:49 --> 00:25:52 like most comics, but I'll wait till I get back
00:25:52 --> 00:25:54 to my hotel and then I'll open it just hoping
00:25:54 --> 00:25:56 that it's the number I thought we negotiated.
00:25:56 --> 00:25:59 But it's more likely that it's going to be less
00:25:59 --> 00:26:01 and then I have to go down to the hotel lobby
00:26:01 --> 00:26:04 and get a fucking sandwich and a Dr. Pepper at
00:26:04 --> 00:26:07 midnight from some shitty hotel food and then...
00:26:06 --> 00:26:08 Go upstairs and be like fuck this place. I'm
00:26:08 --> 00:26:10 never coming back. Yeah, then there's something
00:26:10 --> 00:26:12 about that though Like I don't I don't know what
00:26:12 --> 00:26:14 it is I think it's maybe it's just like it is
00:26:14 --> 00:26:16 just the grind and just in the grind and then
00:26:16 --> 00:26:18 just getting that dr Pepper and sandwich Yeah,
00:26:19 --> 00:26:21 you're just like, you know what like I don't
00:26:21 --> 00:26:22 well all of it's like I always say it's like
00:26:22 --> 00:26:25 Ray Lewis one time he said like You pay me Monday
00:26:25 --> 00:26:28 through Saturday. I do Sunday for free and that's
00:26:28 --> 00:26:32 what stand -up is like you pay me To, you know,
00:26:32 --> 00:26:35 rent a car, be in a hotel, go to the airport,
00:26:35 --> 00:26:38 be away from loved ones, miss, you know, weddings
00:26:38 --> 00:26:41 or family events or important shit. The actual
00:26:41 --> 00:26:43 time on stage, that's how I do that for free.
00:26:43 --> 00:26:45 That's not, that's not the job. The job is everything
00:26:45 --> 00:26:49 else that, you know, promoting and editing and
00:26:49 --> 00:26:51 just the dumb shit. The actual, the second I
00:26:51 --> 00:26:54 walk on stage, the second I end, that's, that's
00:26:54 --> 00:26:57 just the, that's, that's not work at all. It's
00:26:57 --> 00:26:59 a release. Yeah, that's the best part. I love
00:26:59 --> 00:27:02 hosting. Just like just hosted open mic. Yeah.
00:27:02 --> 00:27:05 And I love that because I feel like I don't really
00:27:05 --> 00:27:07 try materials and you know what I mean? Like
00:27:07 --> 00:27:09 I just kind of just go and just have fun and
00:27:09 --> 00:27:12 and I always find like that I'm more like free.
00:27:12 --> 00:27:13 Well, yeah, you're just in the moment, but you
00:27:13 --> 00:27:15 should be trying material when you're hosting
00:27:15 --> 00:27:18 at least once every like three comics. Like if
00:27:18 --> 00:27:21 you want to riff off the riff about what just
00:27:21 --> 00:27:23 happened, sometimes that's that's great for the
00:27:23 --> 00:27:25 room. But occasionally there's nothing to riff
00:27:25 --> 00:27:28 off. and then that's when you just work in it.
00:27:28 --> 00:27:30 You want to use that time to practice a joke
00:27:30 --> 00:27:31 at least because you're the host, it doesn't
00:27:31 --> 00:27:34 really matter. Because if you can try something,
00:27:34 --> 00:27:35 if it doesn't work, you just do the next intro
00:27:35 --> 00:27:37 and then they'll forget about it. You don't have
00:27:37 --> 00:27:40 to sit in bombing. You can go, okay, well, that
00:27:40 --> 00:27:42 was shitty, but you know who's not shitty? Here's
00:27:42 --> 00:27:46 my next comic. But if you're hosting, I know
00:27:46 --> 00:27:48 what you're saying, but that stuff I wish earlier
00:27:48 --> 00:27:50 I would have made myself be like, all right,
00:27:50 --> 00:27:53 we're coming with three jokes. We're going to
00:27:53 --> 00:27:56 have 12 comics. Within the first four, I got
00:27:56 --> 00:27:58 to use one. Within the first eight, I got a second
00:27:58 --> 00:28:02 one. We'll try to just because that's what the
00:28:02 --> 00:28:04 older, better comics have told me. They're always
00:28:04 --> 00:28:07 like, dude, open mics. Quit having an ego. Take
00:28:07 --> 00:28:09 more chances. Take more chances. Which I should
00:28:09 --> 00:28:12 do, I mean, but it's easier to sit here and say.
00:28:12 --> 00:28:15 I always say I'm good at giving advice. I think
00:28:15 --> 00:28:17 I say it out loud like I'm saying it to you,
00:28:17 --> 00:28:18 but in my head, I'm just saying it to me again.
00:28:19 --> 00:28:22 I get it. So maybe if I say it to enough people,
00:28:22 --> 00:28:25 maybe one of these times, I'll do. what I'm telling
00:28:25 --> 00:28:27 everybody else to do. Oh, I get it, man. Was
00:28:27 --> 00:28:28 there was there like a piece of advice I was
00:28:28 --> 00:28:30 given to you that you just you're like to this
00:28:30 --> 00:28:33 day you're like this is I you do this every time?
00:28:34 --> 00:28:36 No, because I don't do anything every time. I
00:28:36 --> 00:28:38 mean, like simple stuff like, you know, the never
00:28:38 --> 00:28:41 wear shorts. you know, move the mics, just like
00:28:41 --> 00:28:43 technical shit that you just learn. Yeah. But
00:28:43 --> 00:28:46 like, and you know, like Sam Talent, he's a Denver
00:28:46 --> 00:28:48 guy. He's one of the best comics. He wears shorts
00:28:48 --> 00:28:50 and Gabriel sells out baseball. There's always,
00:28:50 --> 00:28:53 the one thing I'll say is there's no rules. Just
00:28:53 --> 00:28:57 do what's best. But like the best lessons I ever
00:28:57 --> 00:28:59 got were like, the coolest lesson I ever got
00:28:59 --> 00:29:02 was probably from a comic named Jimmy Dore, who's
00:29:02 --> 00:29:06 like just a great comic. And I was, I was young
00:29:06 --> 00:29:08 in comedy and I had just done a weekend with
00:29:08 --> 00:29:11 Ian Bagg. I love Ian Bagg. Ian Bagg is like the
00:29:11 --> 00:29:14 best crowd work guy. So Ian Bagg, I just watched
00:29:14 --> 00:29:16 Ian Bagg just crush crowd work, right? So I'm
00:29:16 --> 00:29:18 just sitting there whining to Jimmy Dore about
00:29:18 --> 00:29:20 it. Like, I don't know, I might do crowd work
00:29:20 --> 00:29:23 and just comedy this, that. Jimmy Dore didn't
00:29:23 --> 00:29:25 say anything. He just lets me riff and just kind
00:29:25 --> 00:29:27 of whine for like 10 minutes. And then he just
00:29:27 --> 00:29:31 grabs a napkin. And he has a pen right there.
00:29:31 --> 00:29:32 And then he just writes, comedy is hard on a
00:29:32 --> 00:29:35 napkin. And then he just sends it to me in the
00:29:35 --> 00:29:37 middle of me complaining. And I just look at
00:29:37 --> 00:29:39 it as like, oh shit. So then he goes, and let
00:29:39 --> 00:29:41 me tell you something about crowd work. Now this
00:29:41 --> 00:29:42 is a different time. This is a different time.
00:29:42 --> 00:29:44 Now crowd work is much more prevalent. But back
00:29:44 --> 00:29:47 then Jimmy's like, Ian's the best at crowd work.
00:29:47 --> 00:29:48 He's the only one doing crowd work. But first
00:29:48 --> 00:29:50 of all, crowd work is reserved for the headliner.
00:29:51 --> 00:29:53 That's the headliner. You don't do crowd work
00:29:53 --> 00:29:55 in front of me. I don't do crowd work, but if
00:29:55 --> 00:29:57 I want to, that's why I'm the headliner. I don't
00:29:57 --> 00:29:59 need you doing shitty crowd work in front of
00:29:59 --> 00:30:02 me. And he goes, secondly, you want to work other
00:30:02 --> 00:30:04 clubs, right? I said, yeah. He goes, if I vouch
00:30:04 --> 00:30:05 for you at another club, if I get you a guest
00:30:05 --> 00:30:07 spot, you can't come in there and do crowd work
00:30:07 --> 00:30:09 because you want to be on TV. Right. I go, yeah,
00:30:09 --> 00:30:11 because you can't do crowd work on TV. It's like
00:30:11 --> 00:30:13 you want to be on serious. You want to have a
00:30:13 --> 00:30:15 CD. You can't do crowd work. And I was like,
00:30:15 --> 00:30:17 oh, yeah, you're right. He goes, crowd work is
00:30:17 --> 00:30:20 just for the ego. He's like, any of us can do
00:30:20 --> 00:30:22 crowd work. It's easy. So then that night, or
00:30:22 --> 00:30:25 it was actually the next night, we're doing a
00:30:25 --> 00:30:26 show at LA Combi Club. They had this beautiful
00:30:26 --> 00:30:30 room in the Planet Hollywood and he never does
00:30:30 --> 00:30:31 crowd work. He always had, he's just a great
00:30:31 --> 00:30:33 writer. But to end the show, I'm standing in
00:30:33 --> 00:30:35 the back of the room. And he just starts doing
00:30:35 --> 00:30:37 crowd work. He looked to this girl in the front
00:30:37 --> 00:30:39 row and he's like, hey girl, you got any tattoos?
00:30:39 --> 00:30:42 And she's like, I got Texas on my butt or whatever.
00:30:42 --> 00:30:45 And then he'd just do crowd work, crush. And
00:30:45 --> 00:30:47 he'd rip on her and then he'd just look at me,
00:30:47 --> 00:30:49 make eye contact in the back room and he'd just
00:30:49 --> 00:30:52 go crowd work so hard. Then he went to another
00:30:52 --> 00:30:55 person. ripped them apart, looked at me, crowd
00:30:55 --> 00:30:57 worked real hard, and the crowd thought it was
00:30:57 --> 00:31:00 part of a bit. They didn't know he was staring
00:31:00 --> 00:31:03 directly at me, and I just sat there just watching.
00:31:03 --> 00:31:04 I was like, holy shit. This dude was teaching
00:31:04 --> 00:31:07 you a lesson. He was teaching me a lesson while
00:31:07 --> 00:31:10 crushing. Wow. He just didn't do his closer just
00:31:10 --> 00:31:12 to teach me a lesson, and he still crushed hard,
00:31:12 --> 00:31:15 and I was like, that was awesome. I tell that
00:31:15 --> 00:31:17 story to young comics all the time, and I'm like,
00:31:17 --> 00:31:20 he... It was just awesome. He didn't have to
00:31:20 --> 00:31:22 do that. And then I was like, you're right. And
00:31:22 --> 00:31:25 then I, then I got over my little crowd work
00:31:25 --> 00:31:27 phase, you know, I was like, okay, right. You're
00:31:27 --> 00:31:28 right. And then I put out a CD and stuff and
00:31:28 --> 00:31:32 I did what he told me. But he, I mean, and he
00:31:32 --> 00:31:34 was right. And my crowd work wasn't that, you
00:31:34 --> 00:31:36 know, it was okay, but Ian Baggs the best in
00:31:36 --> 00:31:38 the world at it. So of course, you know, it's
00:31:38 --> 00:31:39 like, I was watching Michael Jordan. I was like,
00:31:40 --> 00:31:42 I wanted. Go dunk. It was like you're not a dunker
00:31:42 --> 00:31:44 go make a layups or something. I don't it's a
00:31:44 --> 00:31:46 bad analogy But yeah, so shit like that's just
00:31:46 --> 00:31:49 cool shit I learned from you know, and guys like
00:31:49 --> 00:31:51 I was like Stan Hope but Stan Hope will say it
00:31:51 --> 00:31:54 over and over There's no you don't need classes
00:31:54 --> 00:31:55 or any of that shit It's just like just write
00:31:55 --> 00:31:57 as much you can get on stage as much you can.
00:31:57 --> 00:32:01 It's the most It's generic advice, you know comics
00:32:01 --> 00:32:05 one, you know sound like Smart guys or prophets.
00:32:05 --> 00:32:07 There's that's there's only there's two things
00:32:07 --> 00:32:09 just go write and get on stage, that's all it
00:32:09 --> 00:32:13 is. Yeah, yeah, it's an art, you know? There's
00:32:13 --> 00:32:15 no cheat code or we'd all do it. And if I had
00:32:15 --> 00:32:17 a cheat code, I wouldn't tell it to you anyway,
00:32:17 --> 00:32:19 you know? Part of that's, too. I could give,
00:32:19 --> 00:32:23 like, lessons to young comics, but I don't because
00:32:23 --> 00:32:25 they weren't given to me. I had to learn them
00:32:25 --> 00:32:28 on my own. Now, if I'm around a bunch of veterans
00:32:28 --> 00:32:30 in pro comics and sometimes we'll talk about
00:32:30 --> 00:32:33 stuff and then, but kind of you're like, no,
00:32:34 --> 00:32:37 you got to learn this shit. You've got to kind
00:32:37 --> 00:32:39 of learn on your own. And me saying it, some
00:32:39 --> 00:32:41 of this shit, if I said it, would sound arrogant
00:32:41 --> 00:32:43 stuff. But then when you do it, you're like,
00:32:43 --> 00:32:48 oh, so. Yeah. But that's really, I respect that
00:32:48 --> 00:32:53 because I understand it. It's really with anything,
00:32:53 --> 00:32:55 really, that you do. It's kind of like, you've
00:32:55 --> 00:32:57 got to go through the shit. You haven't learned
00:32:57 --> 00:32:59 it. Somebody can't just tell it to you. Yeah.
00:33:00 --> 00:33:03 When I went to CommieWorks, there was a... There's
00:33:03 --> 00:33:06 a waitress, she's like everyone's favorite waitress.
00:33:06 --> 00:33:09 She's been at ComedyWorks forever, maybe 25 years
00:33:09 --> 00:33:11 and she always works the green room. And then
00:33:11 --> 00:33:15 my first weekend at ComedyWorks, she was like,
00:33:15 --> 00:33:17 she was kind of a bitch to me. And now we're
00:33:17 --> 00:33:19 like close friends. And then over time, one time
00:33:19 --> 00:33:21 I was like, yo, why are you a bitch to me? She's
00:33:21 --> 00:33:22 like, man, I didn't know if you were gonna be
00:33:22 --> 00:33:25 around. I'm not kissing ass to everybody that
00:33:25 --> 00:33:27 comes in this green room. You had to prove to
00:33:27 --> 00:33:29 me that you were gonna be part of our ComedyWorks
00:33:29 --> 00:33:31 family. And then I'll treat you like family.
00:33:31 --> 00:33:34 And that's kind of how I'm, I'm very proud of
00:33:34 --> 00:33:37 being a comedian and I'm very, you know, it's
00:33:37 --> 00:33:39 us, but you don't get to just, just cause you
00:33:39 --> 00:33:41 wrote your name on an open mic, doesn't make
00:33:41 --> 00:33:43 you a comedian. You know, that's what I think
00:33:43 --> 00:33:46 is absurd. You can, people just, if you can print
00:33:46 --> 00:33:48 your name at a shitty bar somewhere, you can
00:33:48 --> 00:33:50 start calling yourself a comedian. Now technically
00:33:50 --> 00:33:53 you went on stage, but I, to me, you got to prove
00:33:53 --> 00:33:56 it, you know, and that could be years or it's
00:33:56 --> 00:33:58 just the way, you know, I'm just not going to
00:33:58 --> 00:34:01 let. We all work too hard at this for you to
00:34:01 --> 00:34:05 be a social media Influencer comedian or sometimes
00:34:05 --> 00:34:07 I'd be like that's not a fucking comedian That's
00:34:07 --> 00:34:10 a tick tocker that edits shit and yeah, and they
00:34:10 --> 00:34:12 they make 15 -second reels and the other funny
00:34:12 --> 00:34:15 But they shot him 46 times and edited for three
00:34:15 --> 00:34:19 hours and that's 15 seconds We when you headline
00:34:19 --> 00:34:23 you do 50 minutes an hour That's a lot of, and
00:34:23 --> 00:34:25 no editing, I mean you edit, but like I just
00:34:25 --> 00:34:28 get, I just get very territorial sometimes about
00:34:28 --> 00:34:30 like, stand up is different than like, I used
00:34:30 --> 00:34:33 to, I don't do it anymore, but I used to just
00:34:33 --> 00:34:35 shit on improv, like improv's the dumbest shit
00:34:35 --> 00:34:37 I've ever seen. But I also lived in LA and I
00:34:37 --> 00:34:40 just saw the worst improv. Now, like I don't
00:34:40 --> 00:34:41 know if Second City's still around. Occasionally
00:34:41 --> 00:34:44 I've seen like the best improv, it's really good.
00:34:44 --> 00:34:47 but it's still one out of like a hundred. But
00:34:47 --> 00:34:49 most improv, like when I was in LA and I was
00:34:49 --> 00:34:51 just trying to date like hot chicks that were
00:34:51 --> 00:34:53 too scared to be stand up or they want, they
00:34:53 --> 00:34:55 want, they would do improv. Then I'd have to
00:34:55 --> 00:34:57 sit through these. I'm like, I don't care how
00:34:57 --> 00:35:00 hot she is. It's not worth watching these stupid
00:35:00 --> 00:35:03 improv games. So, cause I always tell them pros
00:35:03 --> 00:35:06 that you guys are just pussies. If you wanted
00:35:06 --> 00:35:07 it, you would be a stand up. You should do a
00:35:07 --> 00:35:11 stand up. Yeah. The, um, I, um, I've been in
00:35:11 --> 00:35:13 a few improv things and I've seen, I've seen
00:35:13 --> 00:35:17 it. I just, I really didn't understand it. Like,
00:35:17 --> 00:35:18 you know, I just was like - Well, did you do
00:35:18 --> 00:35:21 stand -up first? I did stand -up first. See,
00:35:21 --> 00:35:22 I will say this too, while I shit on improv,
00:35:23 --> 00:35:25 is that I did improv classes. I did Second City
00:35:25 --> 00:35:27 in Vegas. I was the worst person in my class
00:35:27 --> 00:35:30 by far. And I had a really talented class. They
00:35:30 --> 00:35:33 were really good. Some of them are like real
00:35:33 --> 00:35:35 actors and stuff now. But my brain, I did stand
00:35:35 --> 00:35:38 -up first. And then my brain would go for the
00:35:38 --> 00:35:41 joke. There's no teamwork in standup, you know?
00:35:41 --> 00:35:43 I mean, you know, so like when I'm doing improv,
00:35:43 --> 00:35:45 I'm not, I don't want to be real giving. I was
00:35:45 --> 00:35:47 like, like we'd be in a scene. I was like, the
00:35:47 --> 00:35:49 joke's right here. And then I was like, well,
00:35:49 --> 00:35:52 it's not mine to make. And then so I would, but
00:35:52 --> 00:35:54 I did like going to this, to the improv classes,
00:35:55 --> 00:35:57 even though I was the worst one in our troop
00:35:57 --> 00:36:00 or whatever dumb shit it's called. But when I
00:36:00 --> 00:36:02 left there, it did make me feel creative. So
00:36:02 --> 00:36:03 I've always told standups, you should do it.
00:36:03 --> 00:36:06 Maybe you'll like it, or at least. I like being
00:36:06 --> 00:36:09 around creative people, just the class. There's
00:36:09 --> 00:36:13 just games. We don't have games to make shit
00:36:13 --> 00:36:16 funny. I saw a comic just came to ComedyWorks
00:36:16 --> 00:36:18 the other day, and he had a wheel. He was spinning
00:36:18 --> 00:36:20 a wheel to get crowd -wrecked topics. He's like,
00:36:20 --> 00:36:23 this is fucking terrible. He used to be a national
00:36:23 --> 00:36:26 touring headliner. What are you doing? You brought
00:36:26 --> 00:36:29 a wheel? What is this? Price is right? Fucking
00:36:29 --> 00:36:32 do your jokes. He's trying to reinvent it. Yeah.
00:36:34 --> 00:36:36 I just used to think he was like a really good
00:36:36 --> 00:36:39 comedian. And then I was like, well, I can't
00:36:39 --> 00:36:42 even watch this. We're spinning a wheel. Right.
00:36:42 --> 00:36:44 What's your favorite fruit or something? That's
00:36:44 --> 00:36:45 how we're going to get crowd work started. I
00:36:45 --> 00:36:48 was like, well, this is good. What do you think
00:36:48 --> 00:36:50 about like themed, like, have you ever done anything
00:36:50 --> 00:36:52 like themed shows or mics or anything like that?
00:36:53 --> 00:36:56 What do you mean? Like. So we got a few of them
00:36:56 --> 00:36:58 here. Right? Where it's like, uh, like they'll
00:36:58 --> 00:37:00 have like a, I don't know, like a gimmick mic,
00:37:00 --> 00:37:03 right? Where they give you a topic. I don't do
00:37:03 --> 00:37:05 shit like that just because it doesn't. I'm always
00:37:05 --> 00:37:07 trying to write my act that I could use. I want
00:37:07 --> 00:37:09 to get paid. You know, I don't, I don't need
00:37:09 --> 00:37:12 a character. You know, I don't want to, I just
00:37:12 --> 00:37:15 want to write my act. So I get it. I mean, whatever.
00:37:16 --> 00:37:19 It's just not for me. Like, you know, that's
00:37:19 --> 00:37:22 one thing I've learned from like some comics
00:37:22 --> 00:37:24 I respect. Instead of just being like, that fucking
00:37:24 --> 00:37:29 sucks. Needed to say that that's not for me Yeah,
00:37:29 --> 00:37:31 it's a little better be like that's because sometimes
00:37:31 --> 00:37:34 these are that's my friends doing stuff More
00:37:34 --> 00:37:36 like you know what I just shit on that guy with
00:37:36 --> 00:37:40 the wheel. He was always nice to me I just I
00:37:40 --> 00:37:42 wish I was better friends than I'd be like dude.
00:37:42 --> 00:37:43 Come on, man. You're a headliner Why you have
00:37:43 --> 00:37:46 a wheel out here? Yeah, but I could have just
00:37:46 --> 00:37:49 said what that's not for me But it's a little
00:37:49 --> 00:37:52 of me disappointed and like I don't you don't
00:37:52 --> 00:37:54 give up like you just keep her get better or
00:37:54 --> 00:37:57 like right Writing's hard, I just don't. You
00:37:57 --> 00:38:00 know, when I see, like, great comics, well, they
00:38:00 --> 00:38:02 don't, the great comics don't usually need to
00:38:02 --> 00:38:04 go to gimmicks. They just are great comics. That's
00:38:04 --> 00:38:07 what I tell people about, like, comedy classes.
00:38:07 --> 00:38:10 When they're like, I do comedy class, I go, why,
00:38:10 --> 00:38:13 comedy classes, have you ever seen, like, a great
00:38:13 --> 00:38:15 comedian do a comedy class? No, because they
00:38:15 --> 00:38:17 don't have time to teach a class because they're
00:38:17 --> 00:38:19 working on their act. Why would, comedy classes
00:38:19 --> 00:38:22 are taught by failures that, and they're not
00:38:22 --> 00:38:23 always failures, but they just don't want to
00:38:23 --> 00:38:26 do the work. Instead of making flyers for your
00:38:26 --> 00:38:29 comedy class, make flyers for your show. Instead
00:38:29 --> 00:38:31 of marketing your comedy class, market for your
00:38:31 --> 00:38:35 show. I could teach a class. That's what I loved
00:38:35 --> 00:38:38 about Ari. If you're watching this and you want
00:38:38 --> 00:38:40 a comedy class, Ari does like a four -hour free
00:38:40 --> 00:38:43 thing on YouTube. Or like Stan Hope will just
00:38:43 --> 00:38:45 say, if you want to learn, just buy a comic,
00:38:46 --> 00:38:48 a beer at the bar. Well, now I read comics like
00:38:48 --> 00:38:51 fucking nerds. sober, so buy a comic or fucking
00:38:51 --> 00:38:54 salad in the middle of the day and we'll, you
00:38:54 --> 00:38:56 know. Like I'm sitting here, I'll talk comedy
00:38:56 --> 00:38:58 with you, we love this shit. If you really wanna
00:38:58 --> 00:39:01 learn, you don't take a class, a class is fucking,
00:39:01 --> 00:39:05 I don't, I'm just anti -class. I mean, I'm just
00:39:05 --> 00:39:09 like, I'm just like a old purist of comedy. Just
00:39:09 --> 00:39:11 cause the guys ahead of me were like, cause when
00:39:11 --> 00:39:13 I was coming up, Louis Anderson and this guy
00:39:13 --> 00:39:14 named Kyle Cease were teaching this class for
00:39:14 --> 00:39:18 like $5 and. Like, the real comics were
00:39:18 --> 00:39:21 like, what the fuck is this? $5 ? Yeah, it's
00:39:21 --> 00:39:24 just like a scam, but people get promised stuff.
00:39:24 --> 00:39:27 Like, you get nothing in this unless you just
00:39:27 --> 00:39:30 work, so. Yeah, everything that, um, I haven't
00:39:30 --> 00:39:31 taken a comedy class or anything, I'm kind of
00:39:31 --> 00:39:34 the same way. I'm like, I don't, I feel like
00:39:34 --> 00:39:35 everything is already out there. Yeah. Like,
00:39:35 --> 00:39:36 you can learn everything. Well, with the internet,
00:39:36 --> 00:39:39 yeah, and podcasts, I learn on podcasts. Sure.
00:39:39 --> 00:39:41 Let's say you can't learn, but, I mean, there's
00:39:41 --> 00:39:43 good stuff, like... Little shit, like I said,
00:39:43 --> 00:39:45 you don't wear shorts on stage. When you come
00:39:45 --> 00:39:47 on stage, you move the mic behind you. There's
00:39:47 --> 00:39:49 stuff like that. But that's something, if I see
00:39:49 --> 00:39:50 a young comic, I just go, hey, when you come
00:39:50 --> 00:39:53 out, like, don't perform with the mic standing
00:39:53 --> 00:39:55 right in front of you blocking you. Just the
00:39:55 --> 00:39:56 first thing you should do is take the mic out
00:39:56 --> 00:39:57 of the stand and move that behind you. Right.
00:39:57 --> 00:39:59 And you could learn that from a class or you
00:39:59 --> 00:40:02 could just keep going and then hopefully, you
00:40:02 --> 00:40:04 know, someone, you know, because I don't know
00:40:04 --> 00:40:06 how I know that, but I just know that. Right.
00:40:06 --> 00:40:08 But I just think when around comics, like if
00:40:08 --> 00:40:11 you just. be around comics. Again, you got to
00:40:11 --> 00:40:12 weather the storm. You got to prove that you're
00:40:12 --> 00:40:15 going to be around. So like when people show
00:40:15 --> 00:40:16 up at ComedyWorks, now I'm kind of like Tanya.
00:40:16 --> 00:40:21 I'm like, I'm with you, but I'm not going to
00:40:21 --> 00:40:23 give you an hour of advice and then never see
00:40:23 --> 00:40:26 you again. If I know you're into this, I would
00:40:26 --> 00:40:27 love to help you, but you got to kind of prove
00:40:27 --> 00:40:30 yourself is kind of my way of thought. Mm -hmm.
00:40:31 --> 00:40:33 Yeah. And like we were saying before, it's like,
00:40:33 --> 00:40:35 yeah, it is something that you just have to do
00:40:35 --> 00:40:37 with anything in life. It's just like you have
00:40:37 --> 00:40:41 to go through the motions. And comedy has so
00:40:41 --> 00:40:43 fucking many. And just because you get good in
00:40:43 --> 00:40:46 one city, it's like, well, dude, there's a whole
00:40:46 --> 00:40:48 country. And every single one of them cities
00:40:48 --> 00:40:50 are different. Yeah, every crowd's different
00:40:50 --> 00:40:52 when I lived in LA. And then what I was doing
00:40:52 --> 00:40:55 in LA, if I go do shows in the Midwest, it would
00:40:55 --> 00:40:57 not do good. But my Midwest, I mean, it was just
00:40:57 --> 00:40:59 a different crowd. You know, you had to adjust.
00:40:59 --> 00:41:01 And then whenever I go to New York, I always
00:41:01 --> 00:41:03 was like that my LA stuff was just weak. I was
00:41:03 --> 00:41:06 like, New York's just more real. I can't come
00:41:06 --> 00:41:09 with this weak shit to LA. And then I don't know.
00:41:09 --> 00:41:10 And sometimes I probably got in my own head,
00:41:10 --> 00:41:12 but I just felt a different energy when I was
00:41:12 --> 00:41:15 in LA. I mean, in New York and LA, LA was just
00:41:15 --> 00:41:18 a different, but I mean, in LA, I lived there
00:41:18 --> 00:41:21 for like eight or nine years, but then I was
00:41:21 --> 00:41:22 just doing the same five minutes because I thought
00:41:22 --> 00:41:25 somebody important was in the crowd. My LA was
00:41:25 --> 00:41:28 bad for growth. Like, I didn't get any better.
00:41:29 --> 00:41:31 Because you think that there's somebody, you
00:41:31 --> 00:41:34 know, the head of HBO's in the back, but they
00:41:34 --> 00:41:37 weren't. So any time I had kind of a cool show,
00:41:37 --> 00:41:39 I wasn't... I should have been taking away more
00:41:39 --> 00:41:41 chance. I should have just always taken more
00:41:41 --> 00:41:45 chances. I've never been to LA. Just been to
00:41:45 --> 00:41:47 New York. That's cool. I was just gonna ask.
00:41:47 --> 00:41:49 LA's cool. I mean, LA was cool. I mean, I get
00:41:49 --> 00:41:52 to see your heroes and like... LA I think it's
00:41:52 --> 00:41:53 different now a lot of people left but when I
00:41:53 --> 00:41:56 lived there it was like I mean you just get it
00:41:56 --> 00:41:58 you could just go in the comedy store and you
00:41:58 --> 00:42:01 could be in the belly room and you know it could
00:42:01 --> 00:42:03 you could see rock and chapelle and Tosh in a
00:42:03 --> 00:42:06 matter of like 45 minutes and you'd just be like
00:42:06 --> 00:42:09 So that part was cool. I got to hang out like
00:42:09 --> 00:42:12 my first week in LA I got to go to Dane Cook's
00:42:12 --> 00:42:14 house, which was crazy. That is insane and I
00:42:14 --> 00:42:17 was like But then I didn't know and then I went
00:42:17 --> 00:42:20 this is a crazy story, but And I had like a big
00:42:20 --> 00:42:22 beard and I had like a cool thrift store shirt
00:42:22 --> 00:42:23 and my swimming trunks because Dane had a pool.
00:42:23 --> 00:42:25 They said we're going to a pool party. And then
00:42:25 --> 00:42:28 I got there and it was so LA because nobody knew
00:42:28 --> 00:42:31 who I was. So then people treated me much better
00:42:31 --> 00:42:33 because they thought I might be somebody cool.
00:42:33 --> 00:42:35 I was at Dane's house. Right. And then I was
00:42:35 --> 00:42:38 at Dane's and then I thought Dane would be, I
00:42:38 --> 00:42:40 thought there'd be like all these famous comics
00:42:40 --> 00:42:41 there. But then when I got there, there was a
00:42:41 --> 00:42:44 bunch of fucking loser, not loser comics, but
00:42:44 --> 00:42:47 just like way below Dane's level. You know, like,
00:42:48 --> 00:42:51 like. L .A. open micers are just like L .A. guys.
00:42:51 --> 00:42:53 And then I remember looking at my friend, I was
00:42:53 --> 00:42:56 like, where's like the famous comics? These are
00:42:56 --> 00:42:58 like all below. These are like comics I would
00:42:58 --> 00:42:59 think Dane would never hang out with. Why are
00:42:59 --> 00:43:02 they here? And I was like, why am I here? I shouldn't
00:43:02 --> 00:43:04 be here. This is Dane Cook's house. I'm not.
00:43:05 --> 00:43:07 I'm like, I'm talking shit about these guys,
00:43:07 --> 00:43:10 but I'm not supposed to be here. And then so
00:43:10 --> 00:43:12 but I just hung out. And then the craziest thing
00:43:12 --> 00:43:16 was when I came, there's a guy sitting. There's
00:43:16 --> 00:43:18 a guy with long hair and he was just jumping
00:43:18 --> 00:43:22 in the pool doing um cannonballs and nobody was
00:43:22 --> 00:43:24 really talking to him and I was like was that
00:43:24 --> 00:43:26 like Dan's like weird uncle or something you're
00:43:26 --> 00:43:28 just like a dude with long hair and then I went
00:43:28 --> 00:43:30 and talked to him and I didn't know who he was
00:43:30 --> 00:43:32 I just talking to him just like I just moved
00:43:32 --> 00:43:35 I'd been in LA maybe like four days I was just
00:43:35 --> 00:43:36 talking to him he was just talking we're just
00:43:36 --> 00:43:39 having regular conversation like two guys then
00:43:39 --> 00:43:42 I went inside and then like no one and I like
00:43:42 --> 00:43:44 to drink But Dane doesn't drink. So then all
00:43:44 --> 00:43:46 these young comics would never drink around Dane
00:43:46 --> 00:43:48 because they're like scared of Dane. It was just
00:43:48 --> 00:43:50 a weird vibe. So then I had a couple of beers
00:43:50 --> 00:43:52 and then Dane was playing ping pong and I was
00:43:52 --> 00:43:55 still like starstruck. So I was just watching
00:43:55 --> 00:43:56 Dane play ping pong and then Dane eventually,
00:43:57 --> 00:43:59 that guy with the long hair, he pulls out a guitar.
00:43:59 --> 00:44:01 He starts playing by the pool. All these people
00:44:01 --> 00:44:03 go sit around. I was like is that who's that
00:44:03 --> 00:44:05 Dan like your uncle or something? He's like that's
00:44:05 --> 00:44:08 Jerry Cantrell from house and Jerry Cantrell
00:44:08 --> 00:44:10 and then he was just sitting there playing acoustic
00:44:10 --> 00:44:12 guitar and then I went down there and watched
00:44:12 --> 00:44:14 but I didn't know I was just a dumb kid from
00:44:14 --> 00:44:17 Wyoming in LA like like again I don't know I
00:44:17 --> 00:44:19 should not have been at Dan Cook's house because
00:44:19 --> 00:44:21 there was some hot chicks of course and there's
00:44:21 --> 00:44:25 like Chris Klein was there the actor Chris Kleiner's
00:44:25 --> 00:44:28 yeah, this is like a long time ago But I was
00:44:28 --> 00:44:30 like, you come in the garage and there's like
00:44:30 --> 00:44:32 Dane's like, yeah, like a black was either a
00:44:32 --> 00:44:35 Lamborghini or Ferrari. Then his like, uh, there's
00:44:35 --> 00:44:38 a surfboard, like a Nickelodeon, uh, choice awards.
00:44:38 --> 00:44:41 I was like, this shit is his house is just dope.
00:44:41 --> 00:44:43 And I was like, and it was like my fourth day
00:44:43 --> 00:44:47 in LA. So stuff like that is like, it was just
00:44:47 --> 00:44:49 crazy, man. And then I got to go to Dane's house
00:44:49 --> 00:44:52 a couple other times. It was cool. I mean there's
00:44:52 --> 00:44:54 stories about I shouldn't tell those but we just
00:44:54 --> 00:44:57 crazy stuff happened and I would just pinch myself
00:44:57 --> 00:45:00 like man I'm a Dane cook about Dane cook's house
00:45:00 --> 00:45:02 and then eventually I'd lived in Vegas I mean
00:45:02 --> 00:45:05 in LA so long and Jeff dies my best friend in
00:45:05 --> 00:45:07 LA and I live with Jeff die and There was a Sunday
00:45:07 --> 00:45:09 one time we had a long night or whatever. We're
00:45:09 --> 00:45:12 laying around Just watching like WNBA. It's like
00:45:12 --> 00:45:14 August me. There's no football. Nothing We're
00:45:14 --> 00:45:16 just laying around with nothing going on kind
00:45:16 --> 00:45:19 of hung over probably and then Dane calls Jeff
00:45:19 --> 00:45:24 He's like, what are you doing? He's like, I'm
00:45:24 --> 00:45:25 out in Santa Monica at the beach. We're playing
00:45:25 --> 00:45:28 some sand volleyball. There's a bunch of chicks.
00:45:28 --> 00:45:29 Everybody's out here wanting to come out here.
00:45:30 --> 00:45:31 Jeff looked at me and he's like, you want to
00:45:31 --> 00:45:33 go? I was like, no. He's like, me either. Then
00:45:33 --> 00:45:35 we just laughed. We're like, if you'd have told
00:45:35 --> 00:45:37 us years ago, we could hang out with Dane Cook
00:45:37 --> 00:45:40 on the beach with hot chicks, I would have walked
00:45:40 --> 00:45:43 from Wyoming. We'd rather just lay on the couch
00:45:43 --> 00:45:47 and watch WNBA. That kind of shit is still surreal
00:45:47 --> 00:45:49 to me. Me and Jeff just laughed to each other.
00:45:50 --> 00:45:52 We don't want to sit in traffic or, you know,
00:45:52 --> 00:45:54 it's like, we just, we're just like, this is
00:45:54 --> 00:45:56 so shit like that in LA. I could tell you LA
00:45:56 --> 00:45:59 stories forever that just like. Just crazy. And
00:45:59 --> 00:46:01 I'm not like that dude. I'm from Wyoming. So
00:46:01 --> 00:46:03 I've never been around celebrities or famous
00:46:03 --> 00:46:05 people. So I never, you know, you know, when
00:46:05 --> 00:46:07 you're LA, everyone's like, oh, they're just
00:46:07 --> 00:46:09 regular, but like not to me, man. It was, I just
00:46:09 --> 00:46:11 be, you know, I always knew how to play it cool,
00:46:11 --> 00:46:14 but I'd always just be like, sometimes I would
00:46:14 --> 00:46:16 just like, if I was at some fancy person's house
00:46:16 --> 00:46:18 or something, I'd go in the bathroom and pee.
00:46:18 --> 00:46:20 And then just like look in the mirror and be
00:46:20 --> 00:46:22 like, can you believe we're fucking, can you
00:46:22 --> 00:46:25 believe we're here? And I just smiled and go
00:46:25 --> 00:46:27 out and be cool. But I never took it for granted.
00:46:27 --> 00:46:30 Like, you know, again, I never dreamed of a comedian.
00:46:30 --> 00:46:33 I was supposed to be a PE teacher. So to be at
00:46:33 --> 00:46:36 a mansion in the Hollywood Hills surrounded by,
00:46:36 --> 00:46:38 you know, people my mom watched on TMZ every
00:46:38 --> 00:46:41 day was like, this is crazy. That is cool. So
00:46:41 --> 00:46:45 that all of it was cool. You know, so, you know,
00:46:45 --> 00:46:47 I say in my book, you know, I outdream my dreams.
00:46:48 --> 00:46:50 Totally out dream. My dreams are like here and
00:46:50 --> 00:46:53 I did I never dreamed I get up and I've performed
00:46:53 --> 00:46:56 all over the world Performing Italy Greece Turkey
00:46:56 --> 00:46:59 Like I'd never thought I would I lived in Wyoming.
00:46:59 --> 00:47:01 I was like if I got to Phoenix I was gonna be
00:47:01 --> 00:47:05 huge Wow. Well at what point were you like, okay.
00:47:05 --> 00:47:08 All right. This is this is it This is this is
00:47:08 --> 00:47:11 where I'm going What to LA I mean like to just
00:47:11 --> 00:47:13 like in comedy like just when you started to
00:47:13 --> 00:47:18 see that like now you're getting It's always
00:47:18 --> 00:47:20 still just going it's all just I've never made
00:47:20 --> 00:47:24 it where I'm like that where it's like You know,
00:47:24 --> 00:47:27 it's still a grind I still know I'm not you know,
00:47:28 --> 00:47:31 I'm not I'm not there where I just know I can
00:47:31 --> 00:47:33 just have every weekend sold out So sure sure
00:47:33 --> 00:47:36 I wish you know, that's how my friends are like
00:47:36 --> 00:47:38 I open for Jeff Dyer a lot I used to, I don't
00:47:38 --> 00:47:42 anymore as much, but I'm so happy for him because,
00:47:42 --> 00:47:44 you know, I'll call him. I used to call him,
00:47:44 --> 00:47:47 be like, dude, sold out weekend. And then after
00:47:47 --> 00:47:49 like the fifth one, he was like, Hey, he didn't,
00:47:49 --> 00:47:51 he, he wasn't, he was just like, yeah, man, I
00:47:51 --> 00:47:53 sell out every weekend. And I was like, Oh yeah,
00:47:53 --> 00:47:55 you too. I guess I don't have to message you
00:47:55 --> 00:47:57 every Sunday night because this is what you do
00:47:57 --> 00:48:00 now. And so that's like, cool. Like that would
00:48:00 --> 00:48:03 be, you know, that's, I would like to get to
00:48:03 --> 00:48:05 that level again, just not for the money, just.
00:48:05 --> 00:48:08 you know, you worry about ticket sales and like,
00:48:08 --> 00:48:11 you know, you know, just like that part, the
00:48:11 --> 00:48:16 stress of like, you know, I'm headlining in Denver
00:48:16 --> 00:48:18 at ComedyWorks on September 16th, but it's a
00:48:18 --> 00:48:20 Wednesday. It's still beautiful out. There's
00:48:20 --> 00:48:23 Red Rocks, there's Rockies games, there's concerts.
00:48:23 --> 00:48:26 Yeah. I'm still not. So now, you know, I'll walk
00:48:26 --> 00:48:28 in there and I'm hoping there's a hundred people
00:48:28 --> 00:48:30 there. But I also think back to when I opened
00:48:30 --> 00:48:32 for Tom Segura, not too long ago, and there was
00:48:32 --> 00:48:36 95 people there. Yeah. And then maybe seven years
00:48:36 --> 00:48:41 later, Tom, I opened for Tom in Aspen in like
00:48:41 --> 00:48:43 the coolest private venue for only celebrities.
00:48:43 --> 00:48:46 And he walked out on stage and he was like, I
00:48:46 --> 00:48:48 come to your little shitty town to practice my
00:48:48 --> 00:48:50 jokes. So in a couple of months I could do them
00:48:50 --> 00:48:52 where the nuggets play, which was just a wild
00:48:52 --> 00:48:55 flex on these rich people in Aspen. And then
00:48:55 --> 00:48:58 he's playing them a basketball arena. So it's
00:48:58 --> 00:49:01 all. You just keep going, you know, like I think
00:49:01 --> 00:49:03 my books and I'm very proud of my book. And,
00:49:03 --> 00:49:07 you know, my book is one, one podcast away from
00:49:07 --> 00:49:09 probably changing my, you know, somebody, if
00:49:09 --> 00:49:11 I, you know, like I did your mom's house three
00:49:11 --> 00:49:14 times before Tom was super famous. Yeah. But
00:49:14 --> 00:49:15 if I went and talked about my book on your mom's
00:49:15 --> 00:49:17 house, it could change everything in a second.
00:49:18 --> 00:49:20 But yeah, you just never know. It's kind of wild
00:49:20 --> 00:49:21 to think that like, yeah, I'm just like, you're
00:49:21 --> 00:49:23 in a community with like, yeah. Or you could
00:49:23 --> 00:49:26 do one video that, you know, like, you know,
00:49:26 --> 00:49:29 I know comics, very big comics that I thought
00:49:29 --> 00:49:32 hated other comics, and then they probably did
00:49:32 --> 00:49:34 hate them, because L .A. was more of like a hatred
00:49:34 --> 00:49:36 thing, but then they saw a couple bits, and next
00:49:36 --> 00:49:38 thing you know, they run the biggest podcast
00:49:38 --> 00:49:40 in the world, and they changed their life. Yeah,
00:49:41 --> 00:49:42 that's wild. So you just never know, man. That's
00:49:42 --> 00:49:44 why you just keep going, and again, I don't do
00:49:44 --> 00:49:47 it for my own, I don't know, I could do, I could
00:49:47 --> 00:49:51 do other stuff. You know, like a couple times
00:49:51 --> 00:49:52 I've had girlfriends like, what would you do
00:49:52 --> 00:49:53 if you couldn't do comedy? I was like, I'd do
00:49:53 --> 00:49:56 whatever the fuck I want, I could sell. I'm good
00:49:56 --> 00:50:00 at talking. Yeah. If I could sell myself for
00:50:00 --> 00:50:02 an hour on stage just so I could go, I used to
00:50:02 --> 00:50:04 tell my ex like, you don't think I'd go get a
00:50:04 --> 00:50:07 job at a car dealership tomorrow and I'd be rich?
00:50:07 --> 00:50:08 Or a couple of times I've done like Christmas
00:50:08 --> 00:50:10 parties for like real estate agents or something.
00:50:11 --> 00:50:13 And they get a little cocky. Like I sold this
00:50:13 --> 00:50:14 house. Like, you know, if I want to be real estate
00:50:14 --> 00:50:17 tomorrow, I'll fucking crush you guys. But I
00:50:17 --> 00:50:19 take some little exam and I don't think I could
00:50:19 --> 00:50:22 sell houses way better than you. You look good
00:50:22 --> 00:50:24 in the picture, but I know how to talk to people.
00:50:24 --> 00:50:26 Yeah, yeah. So that's why I never worry about,
00:50:27 --> 00:50:29 like, I just keep doing comedy till, well, I'll
00:50:29 --> 00:50:31 just never, I'll always do comedy because no
00:50:31 --> 00:50:33 one ever quits. You know, I was talking about
00:50:33 --> 00:50:35 this with comedy and you just, you die. No one
00:50:35 --> 00:50:37 ever quits. Right. Even sometimes people say
00:50:37 --> 00:50:40 they quit, they always come back. And if they
00:50:40 --> 00:50:43 don't come back, that just means they died. You
00:50:43 --> 00:50:45 know? Yeah. Because someone would be like, my
00:50:45 --> 00:50:47 buddy, Matt, he was like, well, so and so, well,
00:50:47 --> 00:50:49 he never did it again. I was like, yeah, cause
00:50:49 --> 00:50:51 he died. If he was still alive, he was eventually
00:50:51 --> 00:50:53 going to come back. Cause once you get a taste
00:50:53 --> 00:50:56 of this, you never. Right, and then you and then
00:50:56 --> 00:50:57 you're always gonna say you're a comedian So
00:50:57 --> 00:50:59 then you meet people and they're like you are
00:50:59 --> 00:51:00 a comedian. Well, you should do it again You
00:51:00 --> 00:51:02 should and then you'd start you see one shitty
00:51:02 --> 00:51:04 comic I could do it again and then Oh, yeah.
00:51:05 --> 00:51:08 Comics just die. No one ever quits. There isn't
00:51:08 --> 00:51:10 many times when I just sat there and told people,
00:51:10 --> 00:51:12 like, you know, that's what I... Yeah, I'm a
00:51:12 --> 00:51:14 comedian, and all of a sudden now I make sense.
00:51:14 --> 00:51:17 Like, just the fact that I just constantly, like,
00:51:17 --> 00:51:19 joke. But it doesn't work in, like, settings
00:51:19 --> 00:51:22 like being a firefighter. I mean, I saw Rickles.
00:51:22 --> 00:51:24 I mean, not Rickles. I saw George Carlin. I think
00:51:24 --> 00:51:27 I saw his third to last show. And I walked out
00:51:27 --> 00:51:31 of there. I think he was, like, 72 or 73. And
00:51:31 --> 00:51:33 at the time, my grandpa was 72 or 73, and my
00:51:33 --> 00:51:36 grandma was helping him, and he was struggling
00:51:36 --> 00:51:38 with older guy stuff. I remember walking out
00:51:38 --> 00:51:40 of the Orleans Casino like, this motherfucker
00:51:40 --> 00:51:45 was incredible at 73. He was so sharp. He was
00:51:45 --> 00:51:48 so... And then he died maybe a month or two later.
00:51:48 --> 00:51:50 But I remember walking out like, I don't know
00:51:50 --> 00:51:53 if I'll ever be that good. And he's 70. And I
00:51:53 --> 00:51:56 just couldn't grasp of like... Having a full
00:51:56 --> 00:51:58 conversation with my grandpa at that point, you
00:51:58 --> 00:52:00 know, there was some struggles his hearing it
00:52:00 --> 00:52:03 was bad Like he was so sharp, but not sharp enough
00:52:03 --> 00:52:05 to go I just couldn't get over how sharp Karlin
00:52:05 --> 00:52:08 was and and like one of his last three or four
00:52:08 --> 00:52:10 shows So he's incredible as I'm saying nobody
00:52:10 --> 00:52:14 ever he never stopped. You just die. Yeah. Yeah,
00:52:14 --> 00:52:16 he is incredible Yeah, is there a certain level
00:52:16 --> 00:52:18 that you're just like like that's like that's
00:52:18 --> 00:52:20 what I'm trying to get to now I don't care about
00:52:20 --> 00:52:22 any of that. Gotcha. I mean, I just financial
00:52:22 --> 00:52:26 I guess to not do pretty good like what I always
00:52:26 --> 00:52:29 love when Rogan's like to me making it and this
00:52:29 --> 00:52:32 is like a generic thing to say is just When you
00:52:32 --> 00:52:34 go to a restaurant and then you just don't look
00:52:34 --> 00:52:36 at the right side of the menu You just look at
00:52:36 --> 00:52:38 the left. That's where I want to be at I just
00:52:38 --> 00:52:40 order because there's a comic for so many times,
00:52:40 --> 00:52:43 you know as a young comic I always knew how much
00:52:43 --> 00:52:45 money I had to the dollar like if it mean you
00:52:45 --> 00:52:47 went out to lunch and I was buying you lunch
00:52:47 --> 00:52:50 I'd be like, okay, that was $24. Okay, I'm 1546
00:52:50 --> 00:52:54 and now I have 1522 but then my phone bill is
00:52:54 --> 00:52:58 $119. I did never have to check. There was no
00:52:58 --> 00:53:01 apps back then. I had it in my head. Yeah. Then
00:53:01 --> 00:53:03 occasionally, and then of course, just the way
00:53:03 --> 00:53:06 life works. Then when I did check it, it was
00:53:06 --> 00:53:08 always less than what I thought I had in my head,
00:53:08 --> 00:53:10 but no. To not ever have to worry about money
00:53:10 --> 00:53:14 would be like, I don't care about money, but
00:53:14 --> 00:53:16 just as a comic for so many years, I just had
00:53:16 --> 00:53:19 to worry about money to now. Now I do pretty
00:53:19 --> 00:53:21 good where I can do whatever, you know, like
00:53:21 --> 00:53:24 I'm a big Bronco fan. Having season tickets last
00:53:24 --> 00:53:28 year was a big thing for me, but, and I like
00:53:28 --> 00:53:29 to spend money on my friend. I like, I don't
00:53:29 --> 00:53:32 have a wife or kids, so I like, uh, and I lived
00:53:32 --> 00:53:34 in Vegas, you know, in Vegas mentality. I was
00:53:34 --> 00:53:37 around the guys I worked for. Whoever's the richest
00:53:37 --> 00:53:39 guy in the room that he just picks up the tab
00:53:39 --> 00:53:42 all the time. Wow. And that's cool. You know
00:53:42 --> 00:53:44 because there's times like I went to dinner with
00:53:44 --> 00:53:46 like one time I got to go to dinner with Rogan
00:53:46 --> 00:53:49 a long time ago And I only had like $200. I didn't
00:53:49 --> 00:53:52 know if you know, I didn't know if Joe was gonna
00:53:52 --> 00:53:56 buy or not but then I was like I Then I ordered
00:53:56 --> 00:53:57 everyone is eating good shit and I ordered like
00:53:57 --> 00:53:59 chicken fingers cuz I was like shit I don't have
00:53:59 --> 00:54:01 much money and of course Joe paid for it at the
00:54:01 --> 00:54:04 end, but I was like mmm, so but just like that
00:54:04 --> 00:54:08 of like now I'm fortunate like When I go out,
00:54:08 --> 00:54:10 I can pick up tabs for my friends or like, you
00:54:10 --> 00:54:14 know, my friends, most of my closest friends
00:54:14 --> 00:54:17 now are employees at ComedyWorks and they're
00:54:17 --> 00:54:19 grinding. So, you know, sometimes I have big
00:54:19 --> 00:54:21 days. I'm like, come on, let's go buy you guys
00:54:21 --> 00:54:23 dinner. I appreciate what you do. So, yeah. And
00:54:23 --> 00:54:26 the same, like I got to open, once that time
00:54:26 --> 00:54:29 I was in Aspen. I get there and then I check
00:54:29 --> 00:54:31 in my hotel room. It was fucking, it was like
00:54:31 --> 00:54:35 a $1 a night hotel room. In my head I was
00:54:35 --> 00:54:38 like fuck Tom just give me this money for three
00:54:38 --> 00:54:40 nights. I was like I'll sleep in my car 36, you
00:54:40 --> 00:54:43 know But then it was just like so nice to him
00:54:43 --> 00:54:45 and then he wasn't I was at this beautiful at
00:54:45 --> 00:54:48 the W and Aspen and then And I hadn't seen Tom
00:54:48 --> 00:54:51 in a lot. I think it's like the comedy gods sometimes
00:54:51 --> 00:54:52 are watching I really believe there's comedy
00:54:52 --> 00:54:54 gods, but I was doing these terrible gigs in
00:54:54 --> 00:54:57 Lake Havasu in the middle of July I was like
00:54:57 --> 00:55:00 120 degrees out. Nobody's coming to shows I was
00:55:00 --> 00:55:02 just sitting in my terrible hotel room, like,
00:55:02 --> 00:55:04 this sucks. This life sucks. This sucks. And
00:55:04 --> 00:55:05 then out of nowhere, Tom's like, you want to
00:55:05 --> 00:55:08 open for me in Aspen at the, at the, uh, what
00:55:08 --> 00:55:11 the fuck's the place called? Anyway, this famous
00:55:11 --> 00:55:14 place in Aspen. And then I got there and then
00:55:14 --> 00:55:16 Tom, like, here's your room. And I was like,
00:55:17 --> 00:55:19 holy shit, I had a bathtub, all this shit. And
00:55:19 --> 00:55:21 then I was waiting and then Tom's like, meet
00:55:21 --> 00:55:24 me outside at like seven 30. And then I'm waiting
00:55:24 --> 00:55:25 for Tom to have a big entourage and everything.
00:55:26 --> 00:55:27 And then I come out, it was just Tom. And he
00:55:27 --> 00:55:28 wasn't even staying at my hotel. He was staying
00:55:28 --> 00:55:30 at a hotel next door, which I don't even think
00:55:30 --> 00:55:33 was as nice as mine. Wow, man. I think he just
00:55:33 --> 00:55:35 did it because he's just a good dude. Like it's
00:55:35 --> 00:55:38 still, I have the, this is wild. I'll show you.
00:55:38 --> 00:55:42 I have, I still have the room key from that day
00:55:42 --> 00:55:45 that I always think of Tom. Look at this. I have
00:55:45 --> 00:55:48 this, the W and Aspen. I still have, because
00:55:48 --> 00:55:51 I just thought it was so cool that Tom. And then
00:55:51 --> 00:55:55 Tom was so, another thing Tom did, he was just
00:55:55 --> 00:55:57 like, I'd never worked with anybody else that
00:55:57 --> 00:55:59 did this. He was like, I don't know what I'm
00:55:59 --> 00:56:01 going to pay you. You just get a percentage of
00:56:01 --> 00:56:04 what I make. And I was like, how fucking cool
00:56:04 --> 00:56:06 is that? And it was very generous and nice, but
00:56:06 --> 00:56:09 I was like, so that weekend, that's why I just
00:56:09 --> 00:56:10 keep that room key with me, just because it reminds
00:56:10 --> 00:56:13 me of like, you know, you go through so many
00:56:13 --> 00:56:15 shitty weekends that, well, that was just like
00:56:15 --> 00:56:17 a cool. I mean, so many cool, I can tell you
00:56:17 --> 00:56:19 so many cool stories. And I knew this girl from
00:56:19 --> 00:56:21 Aspen, super rich girl that grew up there. And
00:56:21 --> 00:56:23 she texted me after the show. She was like, hey,
00:56:24 --> 00:56:25 there's like this restaurant. I don't know if
00:56:25 --> 00:56:28 you could get in it, but you, you guys should
00:56:28 --> 00:56:30 try if you could. I was like, bitch, we're eating
00:56:30 --> 00:56:33 there right now. I'm in there. And then I was
00:56:33 --> 00:56:35 eating with Tom. And then Tom, you know, Tom
00:56:35 --> 00:56:37 was so nice about everything. And then we went
00:56:37 --> 00:56:40 with a group of people and they're all over Tom.
00:56:40 --> 00:56:41 And then Tom's like sitting next to me. And then
00:56:41 --> 00:56:44 he was like, and another thing about going out
00:56:44 --> 00:56:47 with like Tom was like, Because I knew I could
00:56:47 --> 00:56:48 just order whatever I wanted. It wasn't like
00:56:48 --> 00:56:50 the Joe thing. I was going to eat good. I was
00:56:50 --> 00:56:51 like, I'm just going to order what Tom does.
00:56:51 --> 00:56:54 But being with Tom, we come in, we sit down.
00:56:54 --> 00:56:57 They just start bringing all this food. They're
00:56:57 --> 00:56:59 like, here's some oysters from the chef he'd
00:56:59 --> 00:57:01 like to have. The general manager come over,
00:57:01 --> 00:57:05 here's some crab claws. Here's something from
00:57:05 --> 00:57:08 the valet. I was like, Tom, do we ever even order?
00:57:08 --> 00:57:10 They just bring you so much free shit. That is
00:57:10 --> 00:57:12 fucking insane. It was so cool and I'm just sitting
00:57:12 --> 00:57:14 there and Tom just like, this is what it is.
00:57:14 --> 00:57:17 I was like, dude, but shit like that is like.
00:57:17 --> 00:57:20 Again, I always just always comes back to a kid
00:57:20 --> 00:57:21 from a small town kid from Wyoming I was like
00:57:21 --> 00:57:24 I'm fucking in Aspen was one of the biggest comics
00:57:24 --> 00:57:26 in the world And I can't even order because they're
00:57:26 --> 00:57:29 too busy giving me shit. I couldn't order in
00:57:29 --> 00:57:31 my life if I wanted That reminds me of that Kevin
00:57:31 --> 00:57:34 Grant not I think it's Kevin Grant But that that's
00:57:34 --> 00:57:37 special that on that was his name did Kevin Hart
00:57:37 --> 00:57:38 did all right? Yeah Yeah, we were talking about
00:57:38 --> 00:57:41 how the basketball player was like, you know
00:57:41 --> 00:57:43 renting out like Disney World. Oh, yeah Yeah,
00:57:43 --> 00:57:45 it reminds me of that. Yeah. Yeah, cuz I would
00:57:45 --> 00:57:47 be it like I'd be at that level, I'd be like,
00:57:47 --> 00:57:49 oh yeah, I'm just gonna go sleep in my Pontiac
00:57:49 --> 00:57:52 Vibe real quick. No, he was like, you know what
00:57:52 --> 00:57:55 he, that's what I say about Tom, he didn't, it
00:57:55 --> 00:57:58 was gonna be a good, he was really like, but
00:57:58 --> 00:58:00 that's insane, these bigger comics, they've been
00:58:00 --> 00:58:03 at our level, whatever level we're at, but sometimes
00:58:03 --> 00:58:07 they don't, but he took the time to be like,
00:58:07 --> 00:58:11 I'm gonna make this a good, I'm gonna just make
00:58:11 --> 00:58:13 this a special weekend. I mean, he probably didn't
00:58:13 --> 00:58:16 even know it would be that special. He, but that's
00:58:16 --> 00:58:18 just what a good dude it was. He just did something
00:58:18 --> 00:58:20 nice. And then, and then, but then that's what
00:58:20 --> 00:58:22 I learned. If I got to that level, I mean, as
00:58:22 --> 00:58:25 a headliner, I still always whoever's below me.
00:58:25 --> 00:58:27 It's like, can I walk in a green room? I'm like
00:58:27 --> 00:58:30 feature host your stuff's on me, whatever. Whenever
00:58:30 --> 00:58:33 I headline, I try to give a local person a guest
00:58:33 --> 00:58:35 spot, but that stuff I learned from other, you
00:58:35 --> 00:58:37 know, again, that's not comedy class stuff. Like
00:58:37 --> 00:58:40 everything Tom did that time, you wouldn't talk
00:58:40 --> 00:58:43 about it in a class, but I was. I was in a class
00:58:43 --> 00:58:46 and I'm smart enough to learn. So yeah, like
00:58:46 --> 00:58:49 I took from, I've been fortunate to work with
00:58:49 --> 00:58:52 a lot of cool headliners and they're just generous.
00:58:52 --> 00:58:55 And then I want to do the same because, you know,
00:58:55 --> 00:58:57 there's so many hell gigs and shit gigs. Like
00:58:57 --> 00:58:59 I was saying earlier, there's so many times the
00:58:59 --> 00:59:01 paycheck's not what you think it is. I don't
00:59:01 --> 00:59:03 want anybody to work with me to have that. I
00:59:03 --> 00:59:06 want to have like a good, I want them, I just
00:59:06 --> 00:59:08 want to make it as good as it can. Cause no matter
00:59:08 --> 00:59:09 what they're going to have some shitty kicks
00:59:09 --> 00:59:12 coming up probably. Sure. Yeah. Yeah, I can,
00:59:12 --> 00:59:14 I can see like how, you know, like those kinds
00:59:14 --> 00:59:16 of things, those little nuances. I just meant,
00:59:16 --> 00:59:18 you know, I still have a fucking room key in
00:59:18 --> 00:59:20 my wallet for, that's probably three years ago.
00:59:20 --> 00:59:22 It means a lot to a lot of people. Yeah, just
00:59:22 --> 00:59:25 as like a reminder of like, just keep going.
00:59:25 --> 00:59:27 And it's just a reminder of like, like I said,
00:59:27 --> 00:59:30 I was having such a terrible week before and
00:59:30 --> 00:59:32 somehow just out of nowhere, he just hit me up.
00:59:32 --> 00:59:35 He's like, you want to do this gig? And I was
00:59:35 --> 00:59:38 like, yeah. Just lifted you right up. Yeah. So
00:59:38 --> 00:59:40 this is cool. So that's the stuff you can't really,
00:59:40 --> 00:59:43 you know. That's why you just keep going as generic
00:59:43 --> 00:59:45 as it is. Just keep going. You just can't stop.
00:59:46 --> 00:59:48 Because you just never know. Yeah, you never
00:59:48 --> 00:59:52 know, man. You never know. But you can't get
00:59:52 --> 00:59:56 there without doing the work. You can't get there
00:59:56 --> 00:59:58 without learning. And there's many times that
00:59:58 --> 01:00:00 even me, like in my writing right now, like,
01:00:01 --> 01:00:04 you know, I'm fucking like way green, but there's
01:00:04 --> 01:00:07 many times that I'm just like, when I'll write
01:00:07 --> 01:00:09 and I'll be like, let me try this. And it just.
01:00:09 --> 01:00:11 Like it doesn't work here and then it works there.
01:00:12 --> 01:00:14 You know, it might work. You can try it. It might
01:00:14 --> 01:00:17 work in a year or something. Sure. Yeah. I work
01:00:17 --> 01:00:19 with something else or the climate might change
01:00:19 --> 01:00:22 or you might write a joke about lettuce at Taco
01:00:22 --> 01:00:25 Bell two years ago that meant nothing. Yeah.
01:00:25 --> 01:00:28 And now all of a sudden it's like relevant. Yeah.
01:00:28 --> 01:00:30 I mean, that's a weird analogy, but yeah, it
01:00:30 --> 01:00:32 can come. There's stuff that I've shelved for
01:00:32 --> 01:00:36 years that fit in or fit in a book or fit in,
01:00:36 --> 01:00:39 you know, As long as you're writing it, it could
01:00:39 --> 01:00:41 go in a sketch one day. It could go in. It could
01:00:41 --> 01:00:44 even be a tag for one of your friends. Yeah.
01:00:44 --> 01:00:45 There's been countless times someone's like,
01:00:45 --> 01:00:47 hey, man, I had a joke like that that I don't
01:00:47 --> 01:00:49 really do. And they're like, because, you know,
01:00:49 --> 01:00:51 you never want it. That's the worst thing is
01:00:51 --> 01:00:52 stealing some of the material or have someone.
01:00:53 --> 01:00:55 Or if like you had a joke, but then you did it
01:00:55 --> 01:00:57 a bunch of times and then you kind of got rid
01:00:57 --> 01:00:59 of it and then gave it to me. It still could
01:00:59 --> 01:01:01 be disaster because someone could be like, oh,
01:01:01 --> 01:01:04 I remember you told that joke. So it's people
01:01:04 --> 01:01:06 are tricky about taking taglines, but. people
01:01:06 --> 01:01:09 I trust are like, I'll tell them, hey, I wrote,
01:01:09 --> 01:01:11 I was writing something like that. It never made
01:01:11 --> 01:01:13 it to stage, but I think I have this little line
01:01:13 --> 01:01:15 that might work with you. And then they're like,
01:01:15 --> 01:01:17 oh, that's dope. And it helped them. And then
01:01:17 --> 01:01:19 you could have a proud moment of like, oh shit,
01:01:20 --> 01:01:23 that was never for me. That was always, now that's
01:01:23 --> 01:01:25 crushing for them. So that's why you just keep
01:01:25 --> 01:01:27 writing again, like I said, Stan, but anyone
01:01:27 --> 01:01:31 to tell you. So generic, just keep writing, keep
01:01:31 --> 01:01:34 writing, get on stage, keep writing. That's true,
01:01:34 --> 01:01:36 man. That's all it is. That's all it is, man.
01:01:36 --> 01:01:38 But I kind of love writing, man. Yeah, well,
01:01:38 --> 01:01:40 that's great. It's peaceful. Just kind of just
01:01:40 --> 01:01:42 sitting there and just taking an idea. I like
01:01:42 --> 01:01:45 the process of it, just writing everything all
01:01:45 --> 01:01:50 at once and then breaking it down. But the only
01:01:50 --> 01:01:53 time I think that, because my jokes are so silly,
01:01:53 --> 01:01:54 but the only time that I think I've ever been
01:01:54 --> 01:01:57 told, hey, you stole that joke was when. I went
01:01:57 --> 01:02:00 on Kill Tony and I had a Black Widow joke and
01:02:00 --> 01:02:02 I told a Black Widow joke and it was, it wasn't
01:02:02 --> 01:02:05 good, right? But somebody was like, oh, you stole
01:02:05 --> 01:02:08 that from Theo Vaughn. And I go and I watch Theo
01:02:08 --> 01:02:12 Vaughn's Black Widow joke and it's like. Fucking
01:02:12 --> 01:02:15 yeah, the way it should have been done. Oh, yeah,
01:02:15 --> 01:02:18 it's like a shit. It was perfectly done. Yeah,
01:02:18 --> 01:02:20 I was like, how could you even like compare?
01:02:21 --> 01:02:23 Yeah, that's who you know, it kind of reminded
01:02:23 --> 01:02:25 me of the whole Dane Cook Louis CK like yeah
01:02:25 --> 01:02:28 Well the internet don't listen to internet No,
01:02:28 --> 01:02:30 I'm just cuz it just cuz if you have a black
01:02:30 --> 01:02:32 widow joke and someone else has a black widow
01:02:32 --> 01:02:34 joke Then they're gonna say that they could be
01:02:34 --> 01:02:36 about two different things and sometimes you
01:02:36 --> 01:02:40 get I mean back to Kanaan I have gout I got gout
01:02:41 --> 01:02:45 years ago, and like, I get Gout, I start writing
01:02:45 --> 01:02:46 all this Gout shit, because I was like, I've
01:02:46 --> 01:02:49 Gouted him right about my life. And then that
01:02:49 --> 01:02:51 week, Kanane, he also had Gout, and then he just
01:02:51 --> 01:02:54 did this incredible bit about it on Conan, and
01:02:54 --> 01:02:56 then I just had to be like, oh fuck, I can't
01:02:56 --> 01:02:58 even get some jokes out of this pain. Because
01:02:58 --> 01:03:01 he kind of just nailed the whole topic. Everything
01:03:01 --> 01:03:04 I had written was similar, because there's not
01:03:04 --> 01:03:05 that much stuff different you could write about
01:03:05 --> 01:03:08 Gout. But he did it so good, I just had to be
01:03:08 --> 01:03:10 like, well. And then I shelved that. And then
01:03:10 --> 01:03:15 later, years later, I had for a little bit of
01:03:15 --> 01:03:18 little gout stuff that just went a different
01:03:18 --> 01:03:21 direction. But just years later, because I kind
01:03:21 --> 01:03:23 of wrote off that, I was like, Kanaan pretty
01:03:23 --> 01:03:25 much nailed it. But then my gout flared up and
01:03:25 --> 01:03:27 other weird shit happened to me. I was like,
01:03:27 --> 01:03:30 oh, I can still talk about gout, take pieces
01:03:30 --> 01:03:33 of what I started with and then do something
01:03:33 --> 01:03:36 that's not similar to Kanaan's at all. It's a
01:03:36 --> 01:03:38 gout bit. But it's different. It's a different
01:03:38 --> 01:03:41 thing. So what does it do? Like, it just hurts
01:03:41 --> 01:03:45 like shit. Well, they call it the King's disease.
01:03:45 --> 01:03:47 And then you get it from like, King's used to
01:03:47 --> 01:03:49 get it. It's like, I always say it's from You
01:03:49 --> 01:03:51 Live Too Good. Like you'll never meet a nerd
01:03:51 --> 01:03:53 with fucking gout. Cause it's like red meat,
01:03:53 --> 01:03:56 alcohol, shellfish. That's why they call it the
01:03:56 --> 01:03:58 King's disease. Cause the Kings used to get it.
01:03:58 --> 01:04:00 So you'll get it in your joint. So I'll usually
01:04:00 --> 01:04:03 get it in my big toe and the uric acid will just
01:04:03 --> 01:04:05 like crystallize and it hurts more than anything
01:04:05 --> 01:04:06 in the world. I would say it's probably pregnancy
01:04:06 --> 01:04:09 and then gout. I've never been pregnant, but
01:04:09 --> 01:04:12 women tell me pregnancy hurts. But anybody that
01:04:12 --> 01:04:13 has gout. It seems like it does. If I even put
01:04:13 --> 01:04:16 like a bed sheet on my foot. it'll go through
01:04:16 --> 01:04:19 my whole body. It's a terrible, terrible feeling.
01:04:19 --> 01:04:20 And there's a lot of comics that have it, because
01:04:20 --> 01:04:24 comics are cool. Comics have it. Rock stars have
01:04:24 --> 01:04:26 it. Comics are fucking dope, too. Yeah, because
01:04:26 --> 01:04:28 they live like king. They live like king. It's
01:04:28 --> 01:04:30 not for nerds. That's why I say pimps always
01:04:30 --> 01:04:33 walk the limp. That's gout, baby. Dumb joke,
01:04:34 --> 01:04:36 but yeah. So that, yeah, I hope you never get
01:04:36 --> 01:04:39 it, but you have to earn it. Again, if you're
01:04:39 --> 01:04:43 not a nerd. Now I just I take a pill every day
01:04:43 --> 01:04:45 and it just goes away. So it's oh, that's awesome.
01:04:45 --> 01:04:47 It's not anything bad Yeah, all my seafood is
01:04:47 --> 01:04:49 frozen basically right now, but I'm working my
01:04:49 --> 01:04:52 way up Yeah, you're good like when you um when
01:04:52 --> 01:04:54 you did your when you do your book So I know
01:04:54 --> 01:04:56 we were talking about before like what prompted
01:04:56 --> 01:04:58 you to even write the book to begin with just
01:04:58 --> 01:05:01 a wild story I was doing so Brad Garrett You
01:05:01 --> 01:05:03 know, the guy from Everybody Loves Raymond, like
01:05:03 --> 01:05:05 the tall guy, famous actor. Little Fish, Finding
01:05:05 --> 01:05:10 Nemo. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Jimmy John's. He owns
01:05:10 --> 01:05:13 a club in Vegas, Brad Garrett's Comic Club at
01:05:13 --> 01:05:15 the MGM, and it's an awesome club. It's one of
01:05:15 --> 01:05:17 my favorites, too. So I would work his room a
01:05:17 --> 01:05:20 lot, and then I became friends with him. But
01:05:20 --> 01:05:23 after shows, Brad always bounces. He's famous,
01:05:23 --> 01:05:24 and people are always waiting for him. So I used
01:05:24 --> 01:05:26 to just sit in a green room and tell stories
01:05:26 --> 01:05:29 to his godson. Ed runs the room, and then his...
01:05:29 --> 01:05:31 His sound guy, Dre, is my boys, and I used to
01:05:31 --> 01:05:33 just sit and tell him all these crazy stories,
01:05:33 --> 01:05:35 and we'd have beers after shows. And then they
01:05:35 --> 01:05:37 kept telling Brad, like, oh, you got to listen
01:05:37 --> 01:05:38 to Brandt's stories. You got to listen to Brandt's
01:05:38 --> 01:05:41 stories. So then one night, I thought Brad would
01:05:41 --> 01:05:42 leave. It was like a Sunday, and I almost went
01:05:42 --> 01:05:45 back to LA with the feature. She was driving
01:05:45 --> 01:05:48 back, and I rode the Asian bus out. There's a
01:05:48 --> 01:05:51 bus from LA, and they call it the Asian bus because
01:05:51 --> 01:05:53 they show like Asian, it's pretty much all Asians,
01:05:53 --> 01:05:55 and then they show Asian movies. They serve Asian
01:05:55 --> 01:05:58 food. I don't want it to, but I was like going
01:05:58 --> 01:06:00 to try to Be woke or something. But it just,
01:06:00 --> 01:06:02 that's what it is. It's an Asian bus run by Asian
01:06:02 --> 01:06:04 people. So I wrote it. It was like 25 bucks to
01:06:04 --> 01:06:06 ride or something, whatever. So I didn't have
01:06:06 --> 01:06:09 a lot of money. So I just rode the bus and then
01:06:09 --> 01:06:11 I was like, but I had a, but Brad gives you a
01:06:11 --> 01:06:13 beautiful hotel room. So I was like, I could
01:06:13 --> 01:06:16 ride back with this comic back to my shitty apartment,
01:06:16 --> 01:06:17 West Hollywood, or I could just spend another
01:06:17 --> 01:06:20 night in this beautiful hotel room and then ride
01:06:20 --> 01:06:24 the Asian bus back. And then, um, luckily Just
01:06:24 --> 01:06:26 stayed for some reason it may have been fate
01:06:26 --> 01:06:28 or something But then Brad comes off stage and
01:06:28 --> 01:06:29 he just looks at me and he's like, oh you guys
01:06:29 --> 01:06:31 I heard you got some stories. Let's hear these
01:06:31 --> 01:06:34 stories. I was like, alright, it was like he's
01:06:34 --> 01:06:35 like you want to get a drink We're like, yeah,
01:06:35 --> 01:06:37 so then we go we walk through the middle of the
01:06:37 --> 01:06:39 casino, which is wild cuz he's you know He's
01:06:39 --> 01:06:42 like 610 everybody recognizes him, but we just
01:06:42 --> 01:06:45 keep going He sees he's always super great grateful
01:06:45 --> 01:06:47 and nice to the fans, but we get to the middle
01:06:47 --> 01:06:50 of the other casino There's a bar in the middle
01:06:50 --> 01:06:53 of the MGM and we sit at this table for top I'm
01:06:53 --> 01:06:54 sitting on this side, Brad's right across from
01:06:54 --> 01:06:57 me, Dre's to my left, Ed's across. And he's like,
01:06:57 --> 01:06:59 you guys want a drink? And we're like, yeah,
01:06:59 --> 01:07:01 so we order, Brad's been sober for a long time,
01:07:01 --> 01:07:03 so he orders like a fruity cocktail or something.
01:07:04 --> 01:07:06 And then me and Dre and Ed, we all get Coors
01:07:06 --> 01:07:08 Lights. He's like, all right, you got stories,
01:07:08 --> 01:07:10 let's go. So I just start telling stories, right?
01:07:10 --> 01:07:12 Just from all of it, from my dad, all the stuff
01:07:12 --> 01:07:15 in the book. And Brad is just sitting across
01:07:15 --> 01:07:17 from me, like hanging on every word. So, which
01:07:17 --> 01:07:20 was good because... all the people wouldn't come
01:07:20 --> 01:07:21 interrupt because they could tell brad was like
01:07:21 --> 01:07:23 really into me talking which was cool because
01:07:23 --> 01:07:25 i'm still talking to brad but in my head i'm
01:07:25 --> 01:07:27 like holy shit i'm telling stories to brad garrett
01:07:27 --> 01:07:29 right and then i'm looking and watching people
01:07:29 --> 01:07:32 watch this and then um so i tell him about our
01:07:32 --> 01:07:34 stories he's like holy shit and then he does
01:07:34 --> 01:07:36 then he did a cool thing just I don't know if
01:07:36 --> 01:07:38 he did it on purpose or not, just to kind of
01:07:38 --> 01:07:40 reset that he's the man, but he was like, all
01:07:40 --> 01:07:42 right, let's order another round of drinks. And
01:07:42 --> 01:07:44 then there was a shot of Louis the 13th on the
01:07:44 --> 01:07:47 wall, some fancy Louis the 13th. And he looks
01:07:47 --> 01:07:49 at us three, he goes, you guys ever had Louis
01:07:49 --> 01:07:52 the 13th? And we're like, no. Then the cocktail
01:07:52 --> 01:07:53 waitress comes over and he's like, how much a
01:07:53 --> 01:07:57 shot of Louis the 13th? And she's like, $317
01:07:57 --> 01:08:01 a shot. Brad's like, what? $317? And he's like...
01:08:01 --> 01:08:03 She's like, yeah, sorry, Brad. I can't do anything.
01:08:03 --> 01:08:04 He's like, all right, give me three of them.
01:08:04 --> 01:08:07 So he orders us these shots, right? And he goes,
01:08:07 --> 01:08:09 all right, keep telling the story. So then she
01:08:09 --> 01:08:10 brings out these shots, which is funny too, because
01:08:10 --> 01:08:12 then we cheers them and then we drank them. They're
01:08:12 --> 01:08:15 terrible. They taste terrible. I don't have a
01:08:15 --> 01:08:16 palette. I think they probably taste good to
01:08:16 --> 01:08:19 rich people, but I'm drinking Corzite. And then
01:08:19 --> 01:08:21 Dre like spills part of his and we're laughing
01:08:21 --> 01:08:24 at Dre like, there goes 125. And then, um, but
01:08:24 --> 01:08:26 then I just keep telling Brad the stories. So
01:08:26 --> 01:08:29 I tell him stories for like two hours. And then
01:08:29 --> 01:08:30 I get up and I go to the bathroom and I come
01:08:30 --> 01:08:33 back and he's like, dude, what you have is a
01:08:33 --> 01:08:36 movie. He's like, you, you have a movie. He's
01:08:36 --> 01:08:37 like, you need to write a script. I was like,
01:08:37 --> 01:08:39 I don't, I don't know how to write a script.
01:08:40 --> 01:08:42 So you got to write a script. And then he's like,
01:08:42 --> 01:08:44 you know what, just do this. Just write 30 pages
01:08:44 --> 01:08:45 of your best stories and then bring them back
01:08:45 --> 01:08:47 to me. And he's like, I'm not saying I could
01:08:47 --> 01:08:49 do anything. I'm not. He's like, I'll try to
01:08:49 --> 01:08:51 help you, but it's Hollywood. I don't know. But
01:08:51 --> 01:08:54 what you have is something special and I'll help
01:08:54 --> 01:08:57 you if I can. And I was like, okay, cool. And
01:08:57 --> 01:08:58 then they must have told him I was on the Asian
01:08:58 --> 01:09:01 bus when I was in the bathroom. And then he just
01:09:01 --> 01:09:04 fucking palm, like, palm me like $200 a handshake.
01:09:05 --> 01:09:06 He's like, get a flight home. He's like, nobody
01:09:06 --> 01:09:09 fucking plays at my club rides the fucking Asian
01:09:09 --> 01:09:12 bus. And I was like, oh, thanks, Brad. And then,
01:09:12 --> 01:09:14 of course, I needed the 200 bucks, so I still
01:09:14 --> 01:09:16 rode the Asian bus. That was like 15 meals for
01:09:16 --> 01:09:18 me. So I just, you know, I was like, thanks,
01:09:18 --> 01:09:21 Brad. So then I went back home and then I wrote
01:09:21 --> 01:09:23 30 pages. And then I came and I brought them
01:09:23 --> 01:09:25 back to him. And he's like, dude, these are great.
01:09:26 --> 01:09:28 But at the time he was producing, I think he
01:09:28 --> 01:09:29 was shooting Fargo or something. He's like, I'm
01:09:29 --> 01:09:31 just really busy. I want to help you, but I can
01:09:31 --> 01:09:33 only do so much. He's like, what you need to
01:09:33 --> 01:09:35 do is write a script or write a book. And again,
01:09:35 --> 01:09:37 I was like, I don't know how to write a script.
01:09:37 --> 01:09:40 And he's like. All right, just write a book and
01:09:40 --> 01:09:41 I was like, all right I was like I'll just write
01:09:41 --> 01:09:43 a book never knowing how hard it was and then
01:09:43 --> 01:09:46 I just So then I had those 30 pages to start
01:09:46 --> 01:09:48 with of stories and then I just started writing
01:09:48 --> 01:09:50 a book and then like a fucking idiot I wrote
01:09:50 --> 01:09:53 a book and then I had no money, you know I just
01:09:53 --> 01:09:55 wrote it the coolest thing about the whole story
01:09:55 --> 01:10:00 is Brad was like So Brad said write 30 pages
01:10:00 --> 01:10:02 of stories and I was like so then I was staying
01:10:02 --> 01:10:06 with Jeff Dye but he flew to like to Europe because
01:10:06 --> 01:10:08 he was shooting his TV show for a month. He did
01:10:08 --> 01:10:10 this TV show with like William Shatner and Terry
01:10:10 --> 01:10:13 Bradshaw, George Foreman and Henry Winkler. So
01:10:13 --> 01:10:15 I just had his house for a month. Yeah, it was
01:10:15 --> 01:10:18 super cool. So he's over there in Japan shooting
01:10:18 --> 01:10:20 all the shows and then he's like, I'll be back
01:10:20 --> 01:10:22 in a month. And I was like, I have 30 days to
01:10:22 --> 01:10:24 write this. I'll try to write a page a day. So
01:10:24 --> 01:10:26 every day I didn't drink for a whole month and
01:10:26 --> 01:10:29 I would go get my steps every day and then I
01:10:29 --> 01:10:30 would just write these 30 pages. And then on
01:10:30 --> 01:10:33 the final day, I finished my 30 page. And I'm
01:10:33 --> 01:10:35 sitting in Jeff's house and my phone starts blowing
01:10:35 --> 01:10:37 up and it's my best friend Justin who's in Vegas.
01:10:38 --> 01:10:41 And he goes, yo, your boy Brad, he's in my restaurant.
01:10:41 --> 01:10:43 And my boy works at this restaurant called Sushi
01:10:43 --> 01:10:46 Samba. I was like, what? He's like, yeah, he's
01:10:46 --> 01:10:48 in here with his fiance. I go, yo, what's his
01:10:48 --> 01:10:51 tab at? He's like, he's at like 128. I was like,
01:10:51 --> 01:10:54 okay, try to not let him order anything else.
01:10:54 --> 01:10:57 Cause I had like $500 to my name, but I was like,
01:10:57 --> 01:11:00 I want to pay Brad's tab. I go, can I pay Brad's
01:11:00 --> 01:11:02 tab? Will you, I'm gonna text you my credit card.
01:11:02 --> 01:11:05 Will you try to, don't let him order anything
01:11:05 --> 01:11:06 else. I don't have a lot of money, but just try
01:11:06 --> 01:11:09 to. So then I send him my credit card and then
01:11:09 --> 01:11:12 he walks out and then he's like, Mr. Garrett,
01:11:12 --> 01:11:15 Mr. Tobler wants to pay for your dinner. And
01:11:15 --> 01:11:18 he said, Brad just goes, what the fuck, man?
01:11:18 --> 01:11:20 Why would he do that? He doesn't have any money.
01:11:21 --> 01:11:23 And then I get that I get a text from Brad which
01:11:23 --> 01:11:25 I still have which is like something I cherish
01:11:25 --> 01:11:27 She's like who the fuck you think you are Steve
01:11:27 --> 01:11:29 win, you know, that was the nicest thing but
01:11:29 --> 01:11:32 it was so cool because Brad You know, you don't
01:11:32 --> 01:11:34 get a chance to do nice stuff for like if Brad
01:11:34 --> 01:11:36 if he wants it You can't buy him a gift or something.
01:11:36 --> 01:11:39 So that was really cool that I got to do That's
01:11:39 --> 01:11:40 something I'm so proud of even though it was
01:11:40 --> 01:11:43 25 % of what I had in life I got to buy him the
01:11:43 --> 01:11:47 dinner and then I am so then I went to So then
01:11:47 --> 01:11:49 I brought him the 30 pages, like three days letter.
01:11:49 --> 01:11:51 And then of course he was like super nice about
01:11:51 --> 01:11:54 everything. And then, um, yeah, then I just wrote
01:11:54 --> 01:11:58 the book and then, um, when the book was finished
01:11:58 --> 01:12:00 again, I was broke. I'd left LA and I just was
01:12:00 --> 01:12:04 writing it in Phoenix, stand up my cousin Kato's
01:12:04 --> 01:12:06 and then I had no money. So I just had to reach
01:12:06 --> 01:12:09 out to like all these teachers that I grew up
01:12:09 --> 01:12:12 with in Wyoming and like a lawyer just. randomly
01:12:12 --> 01:12:15 I reached out for like editing and like five
01:12:15 --> 01:12:18 women helped me and I'm so glad it was women
01:12:18 --> 01:12:21 because they It's written by such it from like
01:12:21 --> 01:12:23 a man's point of view that they gave me good
01:12:23 --> 01:12:26 women notes Like hey, maybe not so many whores
01:12:26 --> 01:12:29 in here stuff like that So they edit it all for
01:12:29 --> 01:12:31 me and then my girl Nikki Ward who I grew up
01:12:31 --> 01:12:32 with went to high school as she did the book
01:12:32 --> 01:12:35 for me the cover and everything in the formatting
01:12:35 --> 01:12:39 and then um So again, thanks to Wyoming Wonderful
01:12:39 --> 01:12:42 women from Wyoming. They helped me finish the
01:12:42 --> 01:12:45 book and then I was still in Phoenix and I got
01:12:45 --> 01:12:48 the book they sent me like a copy to approve
01:12:49 --> 01:12:50 And I'll never forget, I'm sitting in a Chick
01:12:50 --> 01:12:53 -fil -A in Phoenix, and I'm just looking at my
01:12:53 --> 01:12:55 book. I'm just crying, crying about this Chick
01:12:55 --> 01:12:57 -fil -A. You know, Chick -fil -A just has old
01:12:57 --> 01:12:59 people, the working there, so this nice old lady
01:12:59 --> 01:13:00 comes over and is like, son, are you okay? I'm
01:13:00 --> 01:13:03 like, yeah, I'm okay, I'm fine. I remember just
01:13:03 --> 01:13:05 looking at this book like, I fucking, I did it.
01:13:06 --> 01:13:07 And then I was like, what if nobody buys it?
01:13:07 --> 01:13:09 And they're like, who cares? They can never take
01:13:09 --> 01:13:11 this away from me. You know, I did it. And then,
01:13:11 --> 01:13:13 of course, everybody bought it, and I sold a
01:13:13 --> 01:13:15 ton. And like I told you before, it's kind of
01:13:15 --> 01:13:17 funny. I know it's like a back -ed compliment,
01:13:17 --> 01:13:19 and I know they weren't trying to be mean. But
01:13:19 --> 01:13:22 so many people in my life were like, I get messages
01:13:22 --> 01:13:24 that always were just like, dude, I bought your
01:13:24 --> 01:13:26 book because I love you, but it's actually like
01:13:26 --> 01:13:28 really good, which I know what they're saying
01:13:28 --> 01:13:30 is like, I was shocked that I just was going
01:13:30 --> 01:13:32 to support you because I always support you.
01:13:32 --> 01:13:34 But it's actually like a really good book. So
01:13:34 --> 01:13:37 that's always been fun of like. I mean, still
01:13:37 --> 01:13:39 to this day, I know what my image is. I'm an
01:13:39 --> 01:13:41 idiot. I dropped out of junior college. I was
01:13:41 --> 01:13:43 never supposed to write a book. So I don't think
01:13:43 --> 01:13:45 people are expecting that much when they read
01:13:45 --> 01:13:47 it, but it always makes me laugh that they're
01:13:47 --> 01:13:49 always like, holy shit, it's actually really
01:13:49 --> 01:13:52 good. So it is. Yeah. So that's just all, it
01:13:52 --> 01:13:54 just came from Brad saying that. And then, cause
01:13:54 --> 01:13:56 again, like I never dreamed I could write a book.
01:13:56 --> 01:13:59 So, you know, shout out Brad Garrett, like, well,
01:13:59 --> 01:14:00 you know, that's one of the first things I say
01:14:00 --> 01:14:02 in the acknowledgement is thank you without Brad,
01:14:02 --> 01:14:07 you know? So it was, uh, He just said, do it.
01:14:07 --> 01:14:09 And then, you know, I'm a kid from Wyoming. I
01:14:09 --> 01:14:11 keep saying that, sorry. But like, again, Brad
01:14:11 --> 01:14:14 Garrett, he's a famous celebrity. And he was
01:14:14 --> 01:14:16 like, do this. And I was like, I gotta do, I'm
01:14:16 --> 01:14:18 a lazy piece of shit. If someone else told me
01:14:18 --> 01:14:20 to do that, I probably would have never done
01:14:20 --> 01:14:22 it. But, you know, it's like, I never had like
01:14:22 --> 01:14:24 a famous friend. So when he said, do it, luckily
01:14:24 --> 01:14:27 I was like, I should do this. Brad Garrett told
01:14:27 --> 01:14:29 me to do it. So I'll always owe Brad for that.
01:14:29 --> 01:14:32 It was, you know, he didn't have to do it. My
01:14:32 --> 01:14:34 bad. That was my eye. I kicked that over. No,
01:14:34 --> 01:14:37 you're kidding. Yeah, he didn't have to do that.
01:14:37 --> 01:14:39 And then luckily did. And then like he said,
01:14:40 --> 01:14:42 he tried to help it get made as a movie and people
01:14:42 --> 01:14:45 have tried to get it to a movie. But the first
01:14:45 --> 01:14:48 couple of times I got excited, you know, people
01:14:48 --> 01:14:49 would reach out, lawyers and shit, like people
01:14:49 --> 01:14:52 want to buy your book rights. And then I would
01:14:52 --> 01:14:54 get excited, but now I don't. It's all Hollywood
01:14:54 --> 01:14:56 shit. I don't know what's ever gonna happen it
01:14:56 --> 01:14:58 right I don't it's out of if I get a check window.
01:14:58 --> 01:15:00 I don't act I don't I told you I was terrible
01:15:00 --> 01:15:03 damn problem not an actor so I could play When
01:15:03 --> 01:15:05 I was in LA people asked me to act but it was
01:15:05 --> 01:15:08 only like a homeless guy Every every role I had
01:15:08 --> 01:15:10 was just can you lay right here and grunt with
01:15:10 --> 01:15:13 your dirty beard. I was like done so If it gets
01:15:13 --> 01:15:16 made into something it'd be cool probably paycheck
01:15:16 --> 01:15:18 wise, but I don't really care because again as
01:15:18 --> 01:15:21 weird as say I did it Like seeing it sit right
01:15:21 --> 01:15:23 there on your shelf is fucking, it's my book.
01:15:23 --> 01:15:25 I'm gonna show the camera real quick. I wrote
01:15:25 --> 01:15:27 a book, so. Dude, yeah, it's epic, you know?
01:15:28 --> 01:15:30 It's like, you guys, oh my god, you guys gotta
01:15:30 --> 01:15:32 get this book. Gotta get the book. Yeah, you
01:15:32 --> 01:15:33 gotta get the book. Well, you don't have to,
01:15:33 --> 01:15:36 but you should. Go to BrantTobler .com. Yeah,
01:15:36 --> 01:15:37 go to BrantTobler .com or you can just hit me
01:15:37 --> 01:15:39 up on Instagram and just, you can Venmo me and
01:15:39 --> 01:15:43 I'll send you an autographed copy. Oh yeah. But
01:15:43 --> 01:15:45 yeah, I mean, I'm proud of it. It turned out,
01:15:45 --> 01:15:48 it's great. It's a good book, so. It really is,
01:15:48 --> 01:15:50 man. And the other one, I got another one. hopefully
01:15:50 --> 01:15:52 coming out within the next month called Diary
01:15:52 --> 01:15:55 of a Piece of Shit. And it's 50 of the craziest
01:15:55 --> 01:15:58 stories you've ever heard. So I think it's going
01:15:58 --> 01:16:00 to be really good. I'm hoping to finish that
01:16:00 --> 01:16:02 one either tonight or tomorrow, and then it'll
01:16:02 --> 01:16:04 go into editing and all that. But yeah, I have
01:16:04 --> 01:16:07 no book deal. I have no book agent. I just do
01:16:07 --> 01:16:09 it all myself. So if you're thinking about doing
01:16:09 --> 01:16:13 something, you should buy my book. Then it hopefully
01:16:13 --> 01:16:14 it'll inspire you like if this idiot can write
01:16:14 --> 01:16:17 a book this good. I could do it I mean it is
01:16:17 --> 01:16:19 really good. Just just let's throw it out there.
01:16:20 --> 01:16:21 Yeah, we've been talking about it like off -camera
01:16:21 --> 01:16:23 We've been talking about the whole time because
01:16:23 --> 01:16:25 it is just I appreciate it. Yeah, that's what
01:16:25 --> 01:16:28 I'm saying. Like this is like That's why you
01:16:28 --> 01:16:30 should do it because you know, it's just looking
01:16:30 --> 01:16:32 at right now. It's like that's my book Yeah,
01:16:32 --> 01:16:34 cool. I did it and once you do something they
01:16:34 --> 01:16:35 could never take it away from you So just do
01:16:35 --> 01:16:38 it, you know, like that was the realization like
01:16:38 --> 01:16:41 that. This is my book. It'll be here forever
01:16:41 --> 01:16:43 Man, you did good, dude. Thank you, man. I can't
01:16:43 --> 01:16:46 wait to see this movie one day. Hey, let's hope.
01:16:46 --> 01:16:48 That's gonna happen. Yeah, let's hope. You know,
01:16:48 --> 01:16:50 that's gonna happen. If you're watching, somebody
01:16:50 --> 01:16:53 watch it. Yeah, yeah, get it. If your uncle makes
01:16:53 --> 01:16:55 movies, if your uncle Spielberg or something,
01:16:55 --> 01:16:58 hit him up. Right. Yeah. Yeah, it's there's so
01:16:58 --> 01:16:59 much. There's so much. I love about it. It's
01:16:59 --> 01:17:01 just thank you It is such everywhere. I'm gonna
01:17:01 --> 01:17:04 finish it tonight like literally like yeah I
01:17:04 --> 01:17:06 need a book report tomorrow from you know, you
01:17:06 --> 01:17:08 got it. You got it I could I could sit there
01:17:08 --> 01:17:10 and talk about it like for a while just because
01:17:10 --> 01:17:14 it just cool me Thank you, man. I mean, I never
01:17:14 --> 01:17:16 dreamed it. Like I said, I never I'd never dreamed
01:17:16 --> 01:17:19 that uh any of this so yeah, this is all cool
01:17:19 --> 01:17:22 You know, so cool. It is very cool, man. Is there
01:17:22 --> 01:17:24 anything, like, before we wrap it up, is there
01:17:24 --> 01:17:26 anything that you want to, like, put out? No,
01:17:26 --> 01:17:28 no. You can just follow me on Instagram. Just
01:17:28 --> 01:17:30 my name at Brant Tobler. If you want the book,
01:17:30 --> 01:17:33 just hit me up on, you can just Venmo me 25 bucks.
01:17:33 --> 01:17:35 I'll just send it right over. There's no, I mean,
01:17:35 --> 01:17:37 you can buy it on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, all
01:17:37 --> 01:17:39 that, but then they get all the money. Yeah.
01:17:39 --> 01:17:42 If you want to support, like, an artist, just
01:17:42 --> 01:17:45 hit me up on Venmo or... Brant Brant over .com
01:17:45 --> 01:17:47 or Facebook or whatever and then you can just
01:17:47 --> 01:17:49 fend mommy 25 bucks out of 20 bucks for the book
01:17:49 --> 01:17:52 5 bucks for shipping Shoot me an address and
01:17:52 --> 01:17:54 I'll send it I'll sign one sign whatever you
01:17:54 --> 01:17:56 want on there and send it off tomorrow It is
01:17:56 --> 01:17:58 worth or you can do the audio the audio is good
01:17:58 --> 01:18:01 because I did the audio so which was you know,
01:18:01 --> 01:18:03 which is harder than I ever thought but I did
01:18:03 --> 01:18:07 the audio, so if you like, if you listen to this,
01:18:07 --> 01:18:09 you don't think my voice is too annoying, and
01:18:09 --> 01:18:11 you want to hear the book, you can plow through
01:18:11 --> 01:18:13 the book, put it in your ears and listen to it.
01:18:14 --> 01:18:15 Is the audio book on like audible? Yeah, just
01:18:15 --> 01:18:17 on audible, I think, and maybe, I don't know,
01:18:17 --> 01:18:20 wherever. I'm terrible at business, yeah. If
01:18:20 --> 01:18:22 you Google it, you'll find it. You Google it,
01:18:22 --> 01:18:24 you'll find it. It's true. It's true, man. Yeah.
01:18:24 --> 01:18:25 But dude, thank you so much for coming out. Thank
01:18:25 --> 01:18:27 you, man. Thanks for having me. This is awesome,
01:18:27 --> 01:18:28 man. I really appreciate you. Let's do it again.
01:18:28 --> 01:18:30 We'll have to do it again. Oh, yeah, definitely.
01:18:30 --> 01:18:33 Yeah. Like I said, this other book is full of
01:18:33 --> 01:18:35 wild stories that didn't make the first book.
01:18:37 --> 01:18:39 Okay, we can talk. I love talking comedy. That's
01:18:39 --> 01:18:41 why I love most of time people want to talk the
01:18:41 --> 01:18:43 book or like We didn't really get into my crazy
01:18:43 --> 01:18:45 Vegas life, but man, I love talking comedy. We
01:18:45 --> 01:18:49 can do that anytime Me too, bro. I love talking
01:18:49 --> 01:18:51 calm. I'm always rooting for you now. Yeah, I
01:18:51 --> 01:18:55 kill Tony soon free roll get it Seriously, it's
01:18:55 --> 01:18:57 amazing. And yeah, you'll be on Kiltani too,
01:18:57 --> 01:18:59 brother. Let's do it. All right. Well, that's
01:18:59 --> 01:19:00 it, guys. That's a wrap. Thank you for tuning
01:19:00 --> 01:19:02 in. Get your tickets for December 11th for the
01:19:02 --> 01:19:04 show that's coming up. The lineup will be out
01:19:04 --> 01:19:06 soon. So thank you, guys. Adios.